I am very disturbed. Actually, I am very worried.
The thing is that, I am very scared, scared about the fact that me and my boyfriend will not end being together. I really do ant to be him. Just him.
In my dreams, in my reality, I have never ever id magined my life with anyone else but him.
Okay before you all open your eyes wide, here is the thing;
I have written about it before also, the fact that my parents have said a categorical no to me and him because our kundlis don't match. We both in response have categorically stated that we don't care. As a matter of fact, my father recently asked me if I had 'reconsidered'; to which I had replied no. And then later, he had asked me about our future plan.Which btw, is a GREAT sign.
But then, I did something stupid...
Our office clerk and SNM, were talking about Palmistry etc... and I over heard and realised that the clerk knows palmistry and I also showed him my hand. And he also in many words told me that 'madam, jisse aap chahte hain, usse toh nahin hogi aapki shaadi'
And, yes I laughed it off. But the stupid nagging doesn't leave me! AT ALL!
On top of it, my mother dear,is so super concerned about the admission of my younger sister that she is following some advise given by some baba on the television *or so my mother claims* and because my younger sister is adhering to my mother's advise, I too have to do a couple of things that she says. My only concern is that, since she is the one who started the whole kundli natak, that she is making me do things that may just create havoc in my love life. And asking her questions means, a full fledged world war in the house. I avoid most of what she asks me to do by comfortably forgetting it but..
Yes, there is always a BUT, there is always this scare that, I am going to end up losing the person who as made me who I am. I would have probably ended my life, had I not had my boyfriend with me. I was a HUGE mess. I am very scared. I am very confused.
And shit just doesn't get over here... Office is a HUGE mess, a matter is a matter alive till the Supreme Court doesn't kill it. The current matter that I am dealing with is taking its toll on me. I almost decided to quit, till it stuck me that, I have no back up job and I need to double my salary ASAP so that I can get married to the boyfriend ASAP.
There is my stupid colleague SNM, who is living in with his fiancée and they have a pregnancy scare... which basically means that I am in the shoes of the 'Calm them Down' stuff! *Yeah, no ONE knows about this except me!*
And the lesson learnt from all of this- is That NEVER EVER TEMPT FATE! After that happy dappy post that came up a couple of days back... you can pretty much guess, that I am not so happy dappy any more!
DAMN!
The thing is that, I am very scared, scared about the fact that me and my boyfriend will not end being together. I really do ant to be him. Just him.
In my dreams, in my reality, I have never ever id magined my life with anyone else but him.
Okay before you all open your eyes wide, here is the thing;
I have written about it before also, the fact that my parents have said a categorical no to me and him because our kundlis don't match. We both in response have categorically stated that we don't care. As a matter of fact, my father recently asked me if I had 'reconsidered'; to which I had replied no. And then later, he had asked me about our future plan.Which btw, is a GREAT sign.
But then, I did something stupid...
Our office clerk and SNM, were talking about Palmistry etc... and I over heard and realised that the clerk knows palmistry and I also showed him my hand. And he also in many words told me that 'madam, jisse aap chahte hain, usse toh nahin hogi aapki shaadi'
And, yes I laughed it off. But the stupid nagging doesn't leave me! AT ALL!
On top of it, my mother dear,is so super concerned about the admission of my younger sister that she is following some advise given by some baba on the television *or so my mother claims* and because my younger sister is adhering to my mother's advise, I too have to do a couple of things that she says. My only concern is that, since she is the one who started the whole kundli natak, that she is making me do things that may just create havoc in my love life. And asking her questions means, a full fledged world war in the house. I avoid most of what she asks me to do by comfortably forgetting it but..
Yes, there is always a BUT, there is always this scare that, I am going to end up losing the person who as made me who I am. I would have probably ended my life, had I not had my boyfriend with me. I was a HUGE mess. I am very scared. I am very confused.
And shit just doesn't get over here... Office is a HUGE mess, a matter is a matter alive till the Supreme Court doesn't kill it. The current matter that I am dealing with is taking its toll on me. I almost decided to quit, till it stuck me that, I have no back up job and I need to double my salary ASAP so that I can get married to the boyfriend ASAP.
There is my stupid colleague SNM, who is living in with his fiancée and they have a pregnancy scare... which basically means that I am in the shoes of the 'Calm them Down' stuff! *Yeah, no ONE knows about this except me!*
And the lesson learnt from all of this- is That NEVER EVER TEMPT FATE! After that happy dappy post that came up a couple of days back... you can pretty much guess, that I am not so happy dappy any more!
DAMN!
24 comments:
whaaaaaaaaaaat!
stop!
take a deep breath!
and hellooooooooo...yeh palmistry and kundli, sab bakwaas hota hain...and that too you are taking the clerk's word!
hey bhagwan!
nothing can stop you unless you yourself stop it!
keep the faith...till you don't dream it, you don't achieve it!
everything's gonna be alrite...hugsssssssssss:-)
You're a big girl.
It's time to live your own life.
Frankly, your parents don't sound all that bright and you shouldn't let their ignorance ruin your life.
Just my two cents. Take it or leave it.
Have faith and think positive...
If you are destined, you will end up together, no matter.
hmmm...my first time at your blog...
Girl you need a big hug..:)
Stop worrying...the problem is our minds believe negative signs easily..n try to sideline the positive ones...
Go enjoy in the glory of "The Great sign" you just tumbled on instead of the palmistry thing which you dont care about at all! :)
God Bless!
Ignore the person who says they know palmistry...psychics, all of these things. One of my friends has seen 10 just in the last year of various types, and hinges her positive or negative thoughts and hence life on them...but these things never come true...even though so many things said are just reasonable generalities.
Nothing else is relevant when you guys have stood the test of time. You know each other and know it will work. And know you have the patience too. Other things (kundli) I imagine would unlikely have been a barrier if he were rich and Punjabi. Stay patient and positive and dont let these external negativities get to you. I plan for sure to be at your wedding in the next year or two!
Hold On .. but with the advent of the new zodiac.. All this has gone for six our of the window.. isn't it ..
I mean pity why educated people got to believe in all this ..
Its all silly.. God loves all the people why would he make things bad for some ..
End of the day .. if you guys are happy :) rest shud not matter ...
Bikram's
Sakshi,
Relax. I have had some inter-action with those who match KUNDLIs and almost for every DOSH there is an UPAY also. But one has to find the right person and not those who just want to make quick money. I am sure all will be well. Nice lyrics of the song.
Take care
PS : I posted comment on Marks one too.
woah...I get back and this is what I see on this usually positive and bubbly blog.
You choose your destiny. If you want to end up with him, you will- regardless of everything else that you may think is an obstacle. You can always face your obstacles, go around them or turn back. But always ask yourself if you are actually HAPPY with the decisions you're making.
Good luck! missed you, now I need to catch up!take care, and quit worrying :)
Best wishes to you.. you would be sucessfull.
@Sachinky
Everybody has his own set of upbringing, and have seen the world from different sets of eyes. Making a judgment on someone's "brightness" just on the basis of a few lines is too shallow.
Just my two pence. Take it, or leave it.
Definitely, I wouldn't tell you what you should be doing and what you shouldn't be doing. You have lived your life, so you know what is better for you. Yours parents know you more than anyone of us here. So its better if you make your own decisions, especially when this is such a sensitive topic. Discuss it with Shayon but remember, whatever you guys do, just do it mutually..
Just think of Lage Raho Munnabhai, that scene in which Munnabhai holds a gun to the astrologer's head and says "Tereko tera marne ka time pata hai na, toh maine trigger dabaaya toh bullet tere bheje mein ghusega lekin tu toh marega nahin."
That about sums it up about astrology. If astrologers really told the truth they'd be out of a job. Can you imagine a little old lady going to a palmist with her savings and him saying to her, "Umm, all the remaining days of your life will be exactly like this one. You will have no new thoughts, no new joys, no new adventures. You'll die alone. Okay, now gimme five hundred bucks."
My mum is a big fan of astrology, too, and her astrologer's told her I'll get married only after the age of 30 and if she wants to see me get married earlier, she'll have to get these pujas done, visit the temple every Monday and Wednesday, and of course, pay him to pacify the angry planets.
Seriously, now? Seriously! It's just another business to swindle the money out of gullible folks instead of doing like a real job and actually working for a living.
@Shayon
If my unwillingness to let unbridled ignorance pass as "life experience" or "perspective" makes me judgemental and shallow, then so be it.
Good luck to you both.
@Su
Thanks for believing in me :) And I know for sure that your love and support are with me!
Today while I was flicking between channels, I heard this-
"It is not necessary that two people will be alike, or that their choices and liking will be alike, or for a matter of fact that, they understand each other completely.. but if there is this 'connection', nothing else matters!"
Thanks you Su darling :)
@Sachinky
I value your comments, but you have a way of saying things, that often hurt people. Whatever, I say about my parents, I am sorry I will NOT accept your way of putting it the way you have.
I know that I have to live my life. I will live it. And I will also crib about it. Because, it is about the choices that I have made.
My parents are more than welcome to differ from my opinion, and till the time, I am in their house, I am their daughter and their responsibility and I am glad for that. Frankly, being a BIG girl does not mean disobeying your parents or disregarding their feelings.
So, a humble request- NOT TO USE DEFAMATORY LANGUAGE, ESPECIALLY ABOUT MY PARENTS ON MY BLOG!
@Alka
Thanks a ton for the belief.. it means a lot to me :)
@Erratic Thoughts
First, a big welcome and a BIG hug back to you!
I guess, you are right. It is all in the mind. And the fact that, there is always a negative to a positive and a positive to a negative, is what we forget!
Thanks :)
@WWW
YOU BETTER BE here for our wedding, it would be so incomplete without my friend from down under.
Trust me Cats, I can never forget what you did for us!
Thanks :)
@Bikram
Yes, I had totally forgotten about the 13th Sign! :)
Thanks for the much needed perspective :)
Thank you!
@Uncle J
Thanks a ton uncle :) Thank you :) I think, I am done with matching our qualities. And for good!
Now, I just have to stick to my resolution! :)
@Kali
HUGS! Congratulations for graduating from School! I am so happy for you, and I am sorry for not leaving a comment on your blog!
Yes, the right question is about being happy and not doubting the decision that has been made by you or the choice of your destiny!
For lil girl, you are quite a grown up! :)
@Vyankatesh
Thanks :)
@Chanz
Yes Ma'am! I alone will not do anything, I have a tendency of being silly!
Btw- where are you? Disappeared under work?
@TUIB
Yeah, everytime this astro thingy comes, Munna Bhai also comes in my mind.. and so does rest of my family, who got married because of the person that they were getting married and not the stars.
It just amazes me sometimes and makes me wonder, where did this come to my MOM! of all the people!
Thanks :)
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