Friday, December 24, 2010


Dear lovely readers of the blog, I have seen a lot of blogs, read a lot of blogs, and have been appreciated and loved by my fellow blog friends and blogrolled friends. I have also been awarded a couple of blogs (please see side bar of the page) and this year particularly, I have had the MOST support, love and above all friendship of all the people who have shared their blog world with mine. Therefore, I want to pass on some awards to the people who make sure that I continue to love this page and love them!!

PS: I dunno, how to do those fancy badges. So I am just going to try really hard and put the pictures of the awards that I am giving away! (The Name of the awards I gave and the pictures are a little different, but get the drift!!)
So let us start the Award function!!

1. "Wise CRACKED"- This award goes to 'Sorcy'!! I have never read the kind of wisecracks that he writes... then there is gyaan in his own unique style of writing- The teachings and the lesson if you ever follow- The result well maybe more hilarious than what is talked about there. I have always laughed my head off reading his blogs! So to sorcy and his sense of humour! It kept me going!

2. "Soul Sisters"- Have you ever felt comforted even by the silence of the person sitting next to you? Especially if that person is a friend and has come all the way to meet you and catch up! But just having her around makes me feel like I know that she knows and doesn't bother with too many questions. Of course, she also my drama queen, and life would have been a mess had she not been around. Thanks, Kashvi!

3. "Sense & Simplicity"- Writing is all about being able to express yourself the way you want- And that is exactly what Banupriya does. She writes exactly what she feels. In her way. I rediscovered the philosphy of being the simpleton thanks to you!

4. "Guest Appearance"-  And this award goes to the crazy cow- Yeah you guessed it right Ms. Moo herself. The super busy gal, writes out of the moon- literally!
The third person sharing this award is Ms. Shalini. She has just taken off and has not written in like a million years!
Girls- I like to read you- Please WRITE!

5. "Word Weaver"- She mostly does not write fiction, but when she does it is OMG! Chanz is probably the only blogger who is of my age here and she is so awesome at creating the plot and then creating that unexpected ending!! Love it!
This award also goes to Aniruddha, he has a knack of writing 55 words or less, I am a HUGE fan. And of late he has been giving us the glimpse of the budding poet in him! :)

6. "Find of the Year"- This award goes to Suruchi! She writes like she owns the world, I have never ever read or heard (yeah, I know her off-line too, get J now!) anyone who is as outrageous and as outspoken as  her with her head firmly on her shoulders. She is a magical woman to be around.... !!

7. "I love this Blog"- Uncle J's- Because sometimes the perspectives have to change! You need to see and realise the other side of the story as well!
Bikramjit- I love the rawness that his blog has. Plus, he often writes about issues that I love having heated discussion about. I have often been the Devil's advocate there! ;P

8 "Musical Paradise"- I have not yet figured how to do the badges and her blog has the best English music recommendations as blog posts. Ms. BloodyMary- The music fanatic! :)

9. "Anti- Thesis"- See, I am going to be a little bias on this one- because well, this goes to Shayon! (now you know why I said about the bias!) I learnt (and not in the nicest of the ways) about the darkest form of writing from this guy. He hits you with his sarcasm where it hurts the most. Moulds your own words and thoughts against you, and does exactly opposite of what 'norms' are! His writings are/ were the chaat masala in my daily dull life, now I have to satisfy myself with the 'Tweets'. But that does not mean that he is not nice, when he is in the nice mood, he writes in a way more tender than the flower!

I really hope that you all enjoy your awards and continue to be the wonderful people that you are! Thank you!

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

I am so angry!

For the last couple of days, I have been nothing but angry. I have been snapping like there is no tomorrow, and I have been extremely mad at everything.
From the daily mundane activities to the plans that go haywire any which ways, I have been plain angry. I have been trying to figure out what is it that is making me so snappy... and even though I tried so hard, there is no explanation as to what is making me so so angry.

The worst thing being- that there is hardly a week for this dumb year to end, and I really want that the next year is a better, much much better beginning and continuation of the things that have gone surprisingly wrong this year. I don't want to enter the New Year, the new decade with no peace within myself at all. I don't want to be angry, sad, despising myself or hating the world around me.

I think, I am looking for that one little thread, of hope and faith that all is not lost and that there is some sanity left in me. That there is more to life than the worst things that I have been thru this year.
I am restless and cranky.
And I am tired of being that.
I know that there is so much more to life than being angry about the things that don't matter, but, there is something in me that is ready to explode.. it is choking me.. and has become that nagging feeling which refuses to leave me.. and is no even letting me go!!!!!

*Breathing* *Deep Breathing* and hoping to calm myself down!!!

Friday, December 17, 2010

The Miss you Moments of 2010!!!!!

The year was not that bad either! I know it was horrible for all the things that could have and that have gone wrong, but then, I guess- there are some reasons, GOOD reasons which will always make me look back to this year and make me smile and blush!

So here are my top most beautiful reasons of this being THE year *all in random order, even though am trying to make em chronological!*

1. The 1st day- Who in the world keeps an exam on the 1st of January- It was so hilarious for all of us, that we could hardly study for the paper! And all of us were exhausted and mad at our university for spoiling the New Year's Eve for us! This was also the day that I had like the longest chat in the world with Shayon's mom.. and she was super convinced that this year I would spill the beans!

2. Shayon's first trip to Delhi- Shayon's first trip to Delhi happened on the republic day and I drove all the way to Airport, his flight was super late and I got super frustrated waiting for the damn flight to land.. I carried flowers for him and well, I think I was so excited that I just kept on blabbering and also managed to get lost driving back from the airport!

3. Make UP!!! - Yes there was the tough period that our relationship saw, but then there was the 'Make up' that also happened *and thank GOD, it happened*, I had not even realised that I was miserable most of the time when that miserable period was going on. It re introduced me to my own self once again, and also showed the total 'Romeo' side of my darling! It was THE most enlightening moment of my life- To know how much I mean to Shayon and the fact, that how important he is to me in my life. And right now I have tears in my eyes after reading this Make up post that he had written for us on this blog!

4. I Graduated- WITH Hons!- Yeah, I graduated. And in first Division! And was also crowned as Ms. LL.B at the farewell. I think I was THE most emotional at the farewell, but by far it was the best party that our college and juniors had thrown... in all respects. Everything was just as it should have been- Intimate- Close and heart-warming!

5. My parents 25th Wedding Anniversary- Which ofcourse was like the bestest thing that I did. I think the fact I had put everything that I had into this event, has made it one the most memorable one in my memory *I think I will start pestering my kids with 'How I celebrated your grandparents Anniversary' story very often.. you know just to get the message across to them* And just in case you had missed the details *CLICK HERE*

6. The First Job & Cheque- I think I might as well accept it that my father got me my first job, and now six months later I must admit that it is a fun place to work and I just love the people that I work with. And trust me, I Do not get treated as a special child because of my father.
And yes, there is THE incentive of the cheque at the end of the month- after all 'baap bada na bhaiya, the whole thing is that- ki sabse bada rupaiyaa'! But it is a satisfaction to not to ask for money from my dad every morning!

7. Shayon is Back to Delhi!!!!- This was LIKE the, the life changing event of the year. With him moving back! *I just dunno what more to write in here!* *rest is highly classified information ;)*

8. Kashvi moving to Delhi!- I know she is having a really bad time being away from home, but somehow her presence in the city makes me feel so much more comfortable!

9. The Birthday- It was special because- of this! (And I had this party and had Kashvi with on my birthday :)))

10. Breaking the NEWS!- The last time I decided something and broke that news to my parents, I was still a teenager. This year when I went up to my parents, to tell them about Shayon and me, I had become a career woman, even if I was just maybe 3 months old in the profession. But never the less- I told them about Shayon, about our intention to get married.. but the anti- climax is- that things are sorta stalled at just this. There is nothing more really happening on that front! More than the news, I think it was the whole journey to go upto them and to talk to them, the distance was more tedious than the destination itself. All the credit for firing me up goes to Shayon and the Best friend, who coaxed me, threatened me and scolded me into doing this. And, I am glad that it has finally happened.
Because, I think, it has changed me. I am still scared of hurting them, and still a little baby- But I have become protective about my relationship and courageous to hopefully steer it in the right direction!!!

And, I think that, this about it- of course, I discovered that I could rhyme a few words here and there and write some poems, but then.. that is not really in the league up there.. but the poems do make me smile!

Special Mention:  Of Suruchi, the tumbler of thoughts- Who came into my life out of nowhere and am super glad that she did! She is one of the finds of this year! And a super special mention of Seeya- The girl who added more dimension to this superwoman! Kisses and love!

So like I said, the year had its high points too, even if they are just 10.. but they have still made a difference in the person that I am. So CHEERS!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

2010: Good Riddance- Part III

I don't remember the last true weekend that I had!
Oh, Wait, I did have a concept of a weekend in the first half of the year. In the last half of the year, the only thing that I know of is the couple of hours on a Sunday where also, I have my dance classes!

So from being a college student I have become a professional now. An Advocate, and there are days when I get up in the morning and think, Oh my GOD! Why can't I bunk? And just stay at home. And do nothing. But, alas, there is no concept of a holiday when you become a professional.

And this year, after 24 years of being a student, from the nights when I was not allowed to stay up beyond 9 pm, the days which were planned according to tuition timings and the exams.. the out station trips that were not taken because of the college exam.. today I have become a professional who has to be in the courts at 10 in the morning, and even on a saturday work. The socializing has strictly become a after 7pm affair..
And even though, I always wanted to grow up, I sincerely don't think that I have mentally accepted the "growing- up" bit!

I said hello to 2010 as an Undergrad, and I am going to say hi to 2011 as a Lawyer. Life has certainly changed and lesson to be kept from 2010- To accept change- Not only in the world, but also in you!

Friday, December 3, 2010

2010: Good Riddance- Part II

So, now that we are concluding the first week of December, I am excited about the last couple of days.*so that this GOD damn year ends ASAP*
You know, there are atleast two friends of mine, that are getting married in the coming two weeks!

*Yeah you guessed it right, the theme of this post is Relationships*

So how do I deal with that. Especially when the opening line of my post was talking about the holy union of two of my real good friends, I just dunno how to put it--- The fact that this year was a BAD BAD year for relationships. *The male- female, love relationship*.
*Otherwise, my darling Suruchi found a whole new meaning to the word Mother- Seeya!, So therefore not talking about the whole gammot of relationships here*

The first and foremost, is the my own relationship, that I had given up on. The thing that I cherished for the longest time with all the sanity that I had- I just .. well.
And it is not only me. I know that a lot of people, really close to me, who thought that things will eventually work out for them, had to settle for- the non working out of the things that you would really want.

I am an optimist, and I never for once doubted all those relationships and their future, hell- I did not doubt on mine till it was too late and I had inflicted enough damage!
And with each heart break that I heard about, my own nightmares returned to me. To revisit the pain of heart breaks is a tough tough job.
As a matter of fact, the whole optimism was shaken to the root, and things that were thought which mattered, actually turned out to be farce. Trusts were broken along with the hearts.
Going by the law of averages- The worst ought to be over, and things should start looking brighter in the newest year *and if cynics are to be believed, then the last two years before the doomsday *.

Lessons Learnt analysing the relationships, heart breaks , heartaches, and marriages this year are the simplest things..
Never ever take for granted- The trust and the love that you have. It is a rare thing to have an a gift to keep.
It always lovely to increase your circle of friends, but NEVER underestimate the love and the understanding of the person who has been your friend for life.
Lastly- To believe and to stand up for the person you love, in front of the society.. No one but only YOU can do that! The strength of a relationship as good as the Confidence that you have in the one you love!

To 2011- Let there be love!
PS: Since I talked about the weddings- One of the weddings is of our dear fellow blogger and my lovely friend Ki! So here is to a new beginning to her! Love you Girl! 

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

You know why they are called as Horrorscopes?

The name reveals it all- That is because they are nothing but a horror story, that makes ones life miserable. And above all, it leaves you with a sense of unease, because, you end up wondering if your actions are governing the life that you are leading or the stars are steering your life?

No, offence to people who believe in horror scopes, as a matter of fact there was a time that I too believed in looking through that crystal ball, and reading the tarot cards, and wondering if it is going to be a good day. As a matter of fact, I remember, when I was going to talk about something really important to my parents, and I saw my horror scope of that day, and according to that; it was a bad time. And then someone told me (I think that was Priyam) that when ever you have to talk about something super scary with your parents, the time is never right!

Can I not owe up to my own actions, and be brave enough to face them rather than waiting for the correct alignment of the stars?
It is sort of a fuck all situation with me.

And, I am facing the "horror" of the horror scope!

2010: Good Riddance- Part I

So, we are finally entering the last phase of the year 2010. The year that was the most awaited by me for many reasons. Well, maybe I should have guessed that this year is going to suck real bad... after all I had an exam on the very first day of the year.

*It is often said that, whatever you do on the first day of the year sets the trend for the rest of the year* So, I was wondering,, as to after my set of last semester exams, how is it that I would be giving an exam the whole year? Even if I count the Entrances (for the Masters), how in the world will I end up giving exams till the last of the year. *I almost did, actually- There was this All India Bar Examination which was Scheduled for 5th of December, which got postponed, thanks to a lot of 'if' and 'buts' and buttheads.*

One of the major lesson that I learned this year was- That we give an exam, each moment of our lives. There is never a moment that goes by when we are not doing something, to set something right. That something maybe a thing that you did in the past, or a thing that you would want to happen in the future, or even making a decision in the present.
Each moment defines who we really are. And, even though the smaller and the insignificant decisions like, to eat or skip a meal or what to wear, may not be really life changing, but then there are decisions, that are life changing, which we take all the time.
About the people who we love, about the things that matter to us and how they affect the people around us.

Even though, age is nothing but a number, this year, I learnt, to grow up, and to own up- Not only to the things that I am proud of accomplishing, but also owning up to my mistakes.

And I throw this year out because : It robbed me of my innocence and my smile! 

Monday, November 29, 2010

Junk Post

There are times in life when you feel that there is nothing more left to it. The world around you has gone mad, and that nothing is making sense anymore!
This is happening more and more with me.
Also that there are a plethora of emotions inside me that I just cannot imagine the existence of! I am hardly happy about anything these days, maybe the most comfortable time that I have had was the Metro ride that I had with Shayon about two days back, where the whole god-damn metro was full and Shayon and I had no choice *or space* but to just chipko to each other and just hold on to each other!

I have also recently discovered the joy of eating alone. Atleast I can have what I want without really bothering that my seniors have to pay for the food. And then I have also discovered the loneliness in the night! And it chills you right to your bones, when you realise that there is no one to talk to! 

Then there are friends that who you always think are friends for life and what not and then they get angry at you for some stupid reason, and a very unlike thing of, I do not even feel like going and coaxing her out of her 'naraazigi' from me.. because- This time, I know that I have not done anything wrong, or that I have done a mortal sin that will place me in hell! *heaven, I know I don't want to be in*. Of course I have said sorry to her and amended my bad and promised her that this will never happen again, but well, I dunno what she really is upto!

And then there are the perfect lives, the perfect stories that are there and then instead of making me happy, they just make me realise, that I am living a life, which has flaws and only that. So much so, that I feel like writing, and all I could come up was this piece of junk post.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Teething Troubles!

One of my father's closest friend is the President of the Rotary Club here in Delhi. And rotary club is known for doing tons of charity and loads of other work for the betterment of the society *NO, I am not promoting them*. One of the project that they plan to under take is "Group Marriage", basically you know getting about 21 couples who are from economically weaker background to have a nice wedding ceremony et all. So when my uncle was talking about this project of yours, my father suggested something else to him as well, something that I believe is totally becoming the need of the hour.

He told my uncle, to have a camp for 'Pre- Marital Counselling'.

There was a time, when the parents chose the life partners for their children and they used to adjust and live through their lives. Times changed, from the rebellion love to today where it is expected that you would choose your life partner. In the words of the old generation 'Zamana badal gaya hai'!

Earlier, it used to be obvious that there would be teething problems, owing to the fact that the two people who are married off with each other being complete strangers to everything about each other. But I have figured that, with the acceptance of freedom of choice, the teething troubles too have increased.
I mean, we know the person who we want to spend our rest of the life with, and we are dating that person for a decent period of time before we decide to take THE step. But, still, we do end up arguing a lot more, the stress level does increase, and at the slightest hint of disagreement, a full fledged argument brews up!

Why is it that as soon as you add 'Marriage' even to the most committed relationship, the equation becomes more and more complicated?
And trust me, I don't think that it is the uncertainty about the person that you are tying the knot to, but more about the 'Expectation' factor that adds fuel to the fire.
And again, the expectation factor becomes a lot more sensitive, when you add the word 'Families' (of both sides) into it.
The 'Us' in the relationship gets a lot wider meaning. There are the parents and the siblings, and the cousins, and the what not.
And even when you just think, and say that 'What matters the most to you is that the people closest to you, the ones that matter, be happy', things just don't work out that way.

Yes, we are living in the times, where even a 'Live- In Relationship' has been interpreted as a 'relationship in the nature of marriage'... but we are also living in the times, where it is not expected that the house will be run on a single salary, but still the parents of the girl, expect that the boy should be earning enough to keep the daughter happy *I mean, isn't it enough that he is readily accepting a tantrum throwing, bad cook, and what not girl (No offence please)*. In the times, when the whole dowry thing is becoming such a taboo and the the couple doesn't even live in the same house as that of the in-laws, there are still expectations for the 'lena-dena' *So many weddings are sponsored by the bride and groom themselves* (again no offence please)...

No wonder with so much happening, and so many things that you dream of about that perfect life, and that little house and everything.. things start going awry and you end up having all sort of weird expectations and even weirder situations. There are tons of things that go wrong.. before and after marriage... and I see all these wrong and dumb expectations in the form of divorce petitions in the courts.

I don't even know, if this post makes any sense, but then, in a bid to you know, understand my thoughts about the whole thing, I spilled it out here. And, really looking forward to what you all have to share with me on this whole thing!
PS: I miss my blog a lot. But having no net connection in office, SUCKS! So sorry for the erratic posting. And, especially the erratic reading. I promise to catch up on everyone's blog, ASAP! This is just a very mad time.

Also, my dear friend Bloody Mary  is really unwell, and Kashvi and I are really worried about her, especially since we aren't getting a clear picture of her condition. I believe in prayers and positive vibes, so please pray and send your good wishes to my dear friend! Thanks.

Monday, November 15, 2010

November Rain

I realised that half of November is gone, and I have not written a single post despite having so many in my mind. This blog is going to the dogs. NOT! I am not going to let that happen. Because, I love this space and this blog has given me much much more than what I can really put down in words.

There was a Diwali post that I had planned, did not even get a chance to be near the computer through the holidays, but managed to maintain the net connectivity thanks to the phone. And then there is the usual series of year end posts that I want to do. And those, I really would do.

The festive season was great, I had my cousins over and my niece and my nephew who I was gonna meet for the first time and it was awesome fun. My three year old niece kept us all on our feet, continuously talking and playing and loving the gifts that were being showered on her from left, right and center.
I also worked really hard to make this Diwali really special because my entire family was with me this Diwali, and the feeling was enough to get me into the festive mood making me soak in the lights and the glamour of the festivities.

On the work front, things are fine. Actually the usual. The most exciting thing being that we have a new intern in office from Gujarat. The seniors in my office are not taking too much interest, and me being totally new (yeah, a couple of months old) can totally understand her feeling lost, especially she being the 'New Girl' in the city. And, I of course have gone through hell in my internships where the seniors were rude, so I am being nice to her and making sure that she is well taken care of. As a matter of fact, she went to this get together with me and I had most of the guys eyeing her (yeah she is very pretty). So this is as exciting as it gets on the work front. And, oh yeah, I heard loads of gossip about Ms. P, my senior from the most unusual source... but since I have no way of verifying it, I let the whole thing go for a toss.

And, now, the November Rain... that was yesterday, when Delhi was in its BEST romantic garb and I was missing Shayon like crazy (the only thing that helped me remain sane was that I was shopping!). The thing is, that because we are working, and well, we do tend to get a lot busy, so we end up not getting to spend too much time with each other. And that is something which is strictly NOT okay with Shayon. I mean it is not either of our fault, but I do have a crazy boss, who told me just the other day that if I want to be successful then I should forget my evenings and that I should be working somewhere around 12 hours a day. I mean, I am freaked!

Right now, life is in a slow whirlwind and I learning how to delicately balance on the beam of life!
And I have this DUMB exam coming up, an I have not even studied for it or started studying for it! I wish that it gets scrapped.
Else, duaan ke bharoe paas hongi!

Saturday, October 30, 2010

Father of the Bride

It is hard being a grown up. You have responsibilities, you have to earn, you have to take care of everything. And in midst of it all, you don't realise when your kids grow up and start sharing your responsibilities, and slowly the next generation has taken over.

But if you are a father of a daughter, you have one major thing to do. To marry off your daughter and send her off with a person who you hope will love her and cherish her the way you have. And being a daughter, I know it in my hearts of heart that no one can match the love of a father towards his daughter. And I personally feel, that since the mothers go through the whole leaving their parents house when they get married, it is the father who has the hardest time in believing that his little girl is all grown up.

Daddy's Lil Girl! 

My father is no different. I still can't forget the day people started seriously questioning his intentions about getting me married. His face just became so so small, and he just gave a weak smile. And whenever I think of that moment, I know I am going to howl myself hoarse at the time my doli will be leaving.

My dad has never really treated us as grown up.. me and my sister.. we are his spoiled brats and even though we do our share of responsibilities, we both just know that the moment dad will get a chance he will treat us like a kid. I still don't take decisions, even simple ones without first asking him. I know on the inside he realises that slowly the time is coming, and he has joked with me a million times telling me that I can reach the mandap and decide not marry at all.... and tell every one that 'mera aaj shaadi karne ka mood nahin hai!'. I know how deep rooted his fears are, about the person who I am going to marry, the family that is going to accept me and how far will I be from him.. but his fears also border on the facts that young people marry rashly and end up getting a divorce *he has had his share of experience in the court rooms*...

Add to this, that stupid Sony Handycam Ad that comes in every commercial break... you know the one that shows the father reliving all the moments of his daughter and then in the last scene she is married and she comes to say bye and her dad says, "I can't believe you are married" and the daughter hugs him and says "I am going to miss you papa" . I choke every time I see that god damn Ad.

Even though, I have always wanted to get married... you know like Geet in Jab We Met... "Mujhe bachpan se shaadi karne ka bada shauk hai" types, it is the realisation of leaving my father and my family behind that makes me cry and shed tears, every time I think about it.

I dunno what is gotten into me tonight.. but right now, I wish I was back being the new born in fathers arms and that I was yet to grow up.

Sunday, October 24, 2010

The Epic Battle of Career and Family!

"Making a Niche for yourself in the Profession, in the male dominated profession.."

This was a line out of a conversation that I had with Ms. P. She is 29. She is round, but pretty, stays all alone in Delhi for the last 9 years. I am not going judge her, but I do have to mention that at times, with the way she is, I feel that she is never going to get married. Something very common for female lawyers, or so I have been told when we both started to have the usual Career v the Family debate.
Not that this thought has never been drilled into my mind, *My mother always cribbed that no one marries a lawyer!* and with what Ms. P told me, it seems to be true. According to her, none of the top female lawyers in the Supreme Court are married. And when I raised my eye brows and looked at her knowingly *my boss is married, and she is a top notch lawyer* she just passed me a little wicked smile of hers, parked the car on the side way and took a fag.
All I did was, sigh, and shake my head. My boss is married. Here are the details- She got married 16 years back to a German. *She is in her late forties* her husband stays and works in Germany. For three times in a year they spend time together, and how-
When she is Germany *Which is mostly in the Summer Vacations* she can't really work. And when he is here *Which was like 10 days in October* she is in office also and she is working also. *Now you understand why I got the wicked smile from P* oh, no she doesn't have kids. Have parents back at home who are old and have their own schedules.
Even though she is successful, she is intelligent and an awesome lawyer and a person, at the back of my mind, and somewhere don in my heart I feel sorry for her. I know what it is like to be in a long distance. And, it almost wrecked Shayon and me, and after marriage, I know that I would NEVER ever want to be in a situation where he and I meet in our holidays.
This is the reason why, she never leaves office before 8 in the night and almost never gives an off even for festivals. She has no one to go back home to. Yeah, you can go back home to your parents, but then having that someone special to go back to each night, that is a different thing altogether.

Take the case of the other two juniors, they both stay on their own. M is a guy and as far as I know has a zero social life. The only social life I have seen of P is when she goes out with her friends drinking. But with an attitude that says that they are all below her and she is OMG so busy. Take for instance now, P's mom is here, and the way she is spending time with her mother *who she has met after so many years* had I been her mom, I would have had a broken heart.

And then there is me. Who has dance classes on Sunday. Likes to leave early at around 6.30ish because I  like to spend an hour with Shayon before heading off home. And I have a life. Thus am considered the most incompetent in the office. Ms. P has her fundas clean and clear and says that she cannot have a career and a family. They just don't go hand in hand.

This on the other hand has got me thinking a lot about why I cannot have a normal family and have a career? Why do I have give up one in order to have another? I know, being a career oriented woman means late nights at office, and less time spent at home.. but then, I am sure that if you do have your priorities right, you can have a high flying career and a family too. A normal marriage with children.
Or is my mind taking a leap into a weird direction? and this is not at all possible.

And how do you really define a high flying career? And what would you do with that career if at the end of the day you do not have the people who love you to share your success with?
Shayon and I have often wondered when will we have enough to enjoy the life that we always wanted to...but there is no definition to what 'enough' really is.

I know that I wanted to be a high flier like Zia Mody (She recently got an award for the Best Corporate Lawyer) but I also know that even though she is married and she has kids, there is no real family that she has. And, somehow, I am not ready to pay that price.
I know that I want to be a great lawyer. But at the end of the day, I also know that when I come back home, I want to spend my evening lounging around with the people who matter the most to me in my life. Any success that comes at the cost of love is hollow for me.

And I want to prove Ms. P wrong. I may not become a great Litigation Lawyer, but I will definitely become a great lawyer and have a normal loving family!
I want this for myself!

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Where there is a Will..

There are no property disputes! *Yeah that was my attempt at bad humour!*

I am not going to give any legal gyaan.. but talk about the, THE most important event that made India shine, the Commonwealth Games 2010!!!!!
Yeah, we pulled it off, and in what grandeur and style. I must say that, it was a success story truly written by the Volunteers, the athletes and the Police...
When I saw the Opening Ceremony on my Television I was mesmerised I was watching it with my mouth hanging open all the time. And all through out the Ceremony  kept thinking, "Jab agaaz itna dilkash hai toh anjaam kiasa hoga?"
I went for the Cultural events that were being organized all over the city, and I was taken aback.. *I was of course expecting superb performance by all the Artistes, but it was the audience that left me in amazement* because, last I remember, the Delhi wallas, did not really had the taste or the patience to sit in plays, in dance recitals, unless they had someone of their own performing.
But, all the places were jam packed. That was the enthu that the people of Delhi had!

I also had gone for one of the Athletic event at the JLN Stadium, and I was lucky enough to be there on the day when the Discuss Players (Women) won all three medals for India. The crowd went mad, everyone sang along the National Anthem.. it was one of the kind moment to experience in your life time to see the Tri-colour waving three times over. And after that, the celebration music was 'Maa Tujhe Salaam' and OMG we sang like, we are the next Indian Idols!
And then there was the Closing Ceremony- And, I dunno how my mother managed it, but she got a couple of passes and I saw it live at the Stadium.. and I have never hooted so loud in my life! Of course the Closing was not as big as the Opening, but it was wonderful, and the last half an hour when all the Singers came and made Delhi go mad was total Paisa Wasool!

And the end of the two weeks, I got thinking, that there was not a single day when I got stuck in bad traffic, or for that matter of there was anything out of the ordinary that we do not see in Delhi. As a matter of fact, I found that the Delhi drivers were actually following the lane restrictions and there was lane driving happening. The crowd which always gathered for some event or the other, was never badly handled, the people were actually talking politely.. and there was a certain calm in the city. A sense safety that surrounded the who atmosphere.
But then, as soon as the games were bid bye, Delhi was back at being the brat that it is. I mean, why can't we the people of Delhi, be the way we were all through the games? Why can't the Police do its job the way it had done all these days. These are just the MOST little of things that we have to do, like, using the public transport, being polite, respecting the Rules of the Road, driving properly and being polite to each other. And, no one can stop Delhi from being a world class city.

I give the entire credit of the Success of the CWG 2010, to all of us, who made sure that the Games make us Shine, and the values of Atithi Devo Bhava are followed to the fullest!
The moral of the Story is that 'Where there is a Will, there is a Way', now that we know the way, and the result of following that way, we have to find that will in us!

PS: Chandni gets the credit for this post, I was not gonna brag about the success of the games, but after reading her, I could not resist!

PPS: Before I forget- Prosperity, Love, Health to all from Maa Durga! and Shri Ram! Happy Durga Pujo & Happy Dusshera to all of You!
In the other news, me and my current partner in Dance Class have been wowed too many times for our connection etc! I am all dancie dancie about it! :)

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Tell her this

Hi! I know, I do not write much on this blog. But then, I stumbled across this particular track while watching Scrubs, today, and the first person that came to my mind was Sakshi. So, couldn't help but share the lyrics, out here. It's called "Tell her this", by Del Amitri.

Tell her not to go
I aint holding on no more
Tell her something in my mind freezes up from time to time

Tell her not to cry
I just got scared thats all
Tell her Ill be by her side, all she has to do is call

Tell her the chips are down
I drank too much and shouted it aloud
Tell her something in my heart
Needs her more than even clowns need the laughter of the crowd

Tell her what was wrong
I sometimes think to much
But say nothing at all
And tell her from this high terrain, I am ready now to fall

Tell her not to go
I aint holding on no more
Tell her nothing if not this; all I want to do is kiss her

Tell her something in my mind
Freezes up from time to time.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

The Colour of the Curtains!

Office has been mad lately. Mainly because, Ms. P, my immediate senior has decided to tun into a witch and a back biting bitch. So, things have been on a hot burner as far as office is concerned. But hopefully things will be back to normal soon! And the courts are off for a week! But alas, the vacation is not for lawyers... the office is open!
This is the bad part of life, right now.

A lesson that I have learn't from the events that have unfolded over the entire of the year that has gone by, is that, advise should only be taken from the people who understand the nature of the problem. People who claim they are your friends, would never do something that would hurt you.. and lastly, it is a hard life, and there are tough decisions that you have to take all the time, and the only way to make those tough decisions much easier on yourself is to know and to have the person closest to you with you.. supporting you.

You all out here told me a million times that, things will be just fine, once he is here in Delhi. And, I was the pessimistic one, almost the one who was so sure that things will fall apart for me. That there will be nothing more but misunderstandings that will be magnified.
Thus to all of you (Especially To Su & TFD), you guys kept pushing me and hearing all my bouts of dumb stupid things that I had to say.
And, today., I salute and thank you for being so optimistic about my love life! Thank you! All of you all who commented and told me that all will be fine.

No, we do not meet every day. That is not a possibility, because we both are working, and both have the tendency of getting stuck at work... but yes, we do meet up for the lunches, and those coffees and we have had couple of dinners too. Sometimes, its hard to believe that I am with him. And sometimes, I just thank God, for being nice to me.

Today, was one of the overwhelming evening that we spent together. We had gone shopping for household stuff. I mean, I have been after his life, to do something about the house, to do something about the house. And, today we both managed to land up in a store and shopped for things that I have never really shopped for. *My mother selects this kinda stuff, all we do is nod in agreement, it is a catch 22 situation when with her.*
So we picked up curtains *Meaning, I chose them, and he gave his opinion and well, we did end up agreeing on the curtains* and Bed Sheets *Well, we both had a little tussle over the colour and the brightness of the bed sheets*  Pillow covers * Thank god, this was the only thing that he agreed to without giving too much of his opinion*  Hand towels *There was a lot of why do I need them about this, but I made him buy it never the less*
And we had a major difference of opinion over the Cushions, which we DID NOT end up buying, btw, he never wanted to buy em, but I wanted to, you know, I like Cushions! There was a lot of if and buts and why. And finally when he did agree, he was not too enthu about it and we left it there.

Because Shayon stays alone *His flat mate is not really interested in anything that has anything to do with him working around the house, so alone.* and he still doesn't have a bai, I have to go and now do up the house...

And it feels totally weird, there was a time, hen Shayon I know never really cared about these little things. I know for sure that he cleaned up his hostel room once in like 2 months *Well, he was hardly in his room any ways!* and totay we are shopping stuff for his house. There is still a long way to go till we have that properly set up home.
But never the less we are trying? Aren't we ?

And, oh, The Curtain in his room is yellow and orange stripes. ;)

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Missing Pieces

Life is a puzzle,
or so it is said, so often,
as you sift through, and
move on,
the pieces join in,
to reveal the master plan..

In this big journey of life,
we often fail too see,
the most obvious,
with our naked eyes.

We miss the pieces,
that complete us,
and give a meaning,
to the otherwise mundane,
journey of life.

I threw away a piece,
thinking that it was nothing,
but a misfit,
but by God's grace,
I found my missing pieces..

As I held you in my arms,
and kissed you for being re-found,
the hazy picture that was,
became a clear window,
into the world afar!

There is a big puzzle now,
to complete,
but it is not mine alone,
now its 'Ours' to complete!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

All that hype!

It seems that the saying, "Badnaam hi sahi, par naam toh hua!" Rings so true in the Indian context.
Negative publicity is one of the favourite national time pass here in India. I mean, why other wise would people make a hue and cry over things like, Richard Gere giving a kiss to Shilpa Shetty, or about the movies, or taking weird photographs (The clever photograph of Sania Mirza with the National Flag at her feet) and then filing PIL's for obscenity, and hurt to national pride.
And in turn getting their 15 minutes to fame.

Lately, it has been the Kalmadi bashing, and generally making sure that India/ CWG gets very nice negative publicity especially since the world was looking at us. And then there is the Aydhoya verdict, as if the whole hype around the real thing was not enough, there were certain nice people who wanted more attention to it, thus they file deferment pleas in the Supreme Court.
And guess what, it takes the Canadian Team to come all the way to India, and take a couple of pictures in the games venue, post it on FB to shout it loud to the world, that dudes, it is all nothing but media hype.

In a democracy, as large as ours, it has become a blessing that the media has been given full fledged freedom to express its views and to give us a much more advanced picture of what really is happening out there. But somewhere, you do end up feeling that this is slowly becoming like poison, you have no idea, what to really believe any more because-
Every news channel has started sensationalizing news for their TRP's. Which, makes the situations nothing more than a double edged sword, where there is a very thin line between what actually is the news and what is made up.

And more than once, media in it is bid to go that extra mile had to be reigned in by the government. I am sure every one remembers 26/11 and the media reports that had to be banned because the terrorists knew exactly what the the plan was and today again the Government had to plead with the media to stop portraying the negative picture of CWG, so that it is successful in all respects.

My question is very simple, that, even though media is considered to be the fourth pillar (After the Legislative, Executive & the Judiciary) of the Indian democracy, don't they understand the concept of responsible journalism? I am very happy with all the sting operations that they do, or all the debates that happen, and all the 'Khulasaas' that they do. But, when the entire pride of your Nation is at stake, do you really have to go all out and find the most absurd news to further the shame?

I am not saying that it is wrong to expose. But, I feel that at times, the media should- Stop. Think. And then, go all out bashing.
And, most of the times, it is the rumours that create more panic than the actual news it self.
Its time to low down the hype, and focus on good journalism.

In the other news, I am still looking for that break in a law firm, a break i.e holidays, (oh, did I tell you that best friend is off to Paris on a office tour.. and all I get to tour is the Supreme Court! Yes, I am a lil J!) and that conversation starter to break the news to my parents.
Loads of Breaks, I am looking for!

Saturday, September 25, 2010

3x7, not the tables, but the Tag!

Chanz and The Wicked witch of the West tagged me into doing this really nice Tag!
Simple ways of knowing the other person!

Just write three things about the seven headings and tag other people!
(For detailed rules, please see Chanz's Tag here! *Am too lazy!:)*)

So here goes:

3 places I would Pack my travel bag for..

1. Backpacking Europe: I am dying to go backpacking exploring this continent. I am fascinated by all those lovely green fields in the Yash Chopra/ Karan Johar movies!

2. Leh & Ladhak: I know after 3 Idiots this is becoming a hot tourist destination, but for me these are the only hill stations that I have not seen in the north. And I have been dying to do so.

3. US of A: Not for anything else but to meet my relatives and to go and spend a month in Disneyworld! :P

And I am going to cheat and write another place that I wanna go to-
Antarctica: What? I wanna see the penguins and the men in igloos!

3 On screen Characters I love to watch:

1. Shah Rukh Khan: For all the obvious reasons I am mad about him, and I LOVE his movies and the larger than life persona that he carries.

2. Neal Caffery (Matt Bomer): In White Collar, its a series on Star World. This guy is total total hot stuff, with his acting and great looks and those deep blue eyes, I think, I am gonna melt!

3. Richard Gere: You need me to spell out the reasons. From Pretty woman to Runnaway Bride, I think, I fall in love with his movies because of him!

3 Moods that describe me the best:

1. The Kid in me: Refuses to grow up, and I love being kiddish and naughty.

2. Cranky: Give me no food, and add to it sleep deprivation and you don't want to be within 200 miles of me. When I am cranky then, I am a bad bad bad person to be around.

3. General Happy Dappy Mood- When I laugh alot and make sure that I make it contagious. :D

3 Things that I think of Doing on a weekend but never did:

1. Clean up my wardrobe: My mom cribs. I tell her, on the weekend. The weekend comes and goes, and I forget. And then my mother cleans it. Changes the location of the clothes, and then, I never find my clothes. *Yeah in a CLEAN almirah*

2. Go out with the Family: I really would love to spend some time with all of em, go out and have some fun.. but unfortunately too many social engagements!

3. Go Party: The concept of a Saturday night is normally lost to the parents here in India. More so, if you are a girl I would love to party once or twice every month.. get ready and hit the floor. But alas, I know that is not happening any time soon.

3 Things from my Childhood I can't Forget:

1. Getting Ready for School: In winters I used to refuse to wake up in the morning, always telling my parents that it is still night at 6.30 am because the sky was dark and there is no sun. It used be a riot to get me ready, my mother would be doing my hair *I had really long hair, and my mum tied it in two pig tails with a ribbon*, while my maid would be doing up my uniform and dad tying my shoes and me being urged by the grandparents to quickly finish my milk. And, then I used to have my chawanprash on the Bike that my dad had that time otherwise I refused to touch it.

2. My grandfather was a member of India International Center, and there, kids under the age of 7 are not allowed inside the dining room *You are seated in the balcony  if you are with the kids*, so my grandfather used to always tell me to lie about my age and behave like a lady inside the dining room *Which I always did*. On of such occasions, I had gone there for lunch with my grandparents and I saw one old uncle eating alone, and I whispered to my grandfather that, I don't like that he is eating alone, and I took my soup to his table and told him that I am having lunch with him coz, I don't like that he is eating alone. *Another thing that my maid used to always crib about was that whenever she took me to the park, I used to sit with all the older uncle and aunties*

3. I travelled by air for the first time at the age of 4. I went with my father to Mumbai. And learned to be independent there. For the entire time that I was there, I used to choose the clothes on my own and keep my hair open as much as I wanted *I was not allowed that at home* and the best part was that I travelled back from Mumbai to Delhi all on my own, trying to converse with the Air hostess in broken 4 year old english.

3 Things I would never say no to:

1. Good Food: I am a foodie! Good food and good company are always welcome.

2. New Clients: I am an Advocate! I will never say no to a client.

3. Gifts: Anything, even as lil as a note written by someone special is a gift that I love to receive. If it is a surprise, sone pe suhaga!

3 Things I cant live without:

1. My Phone: For all the obvious reasons but it should have balance and internet connection.

2. Dancing: Dance is life. It just fills me up with the feel good things and does wonders to my moods and to my life.

3. My Blabbering: I love to talk. I think, I'll be lost if I don't talk as much as I would like to!

And I tag:
Since Su has been tagged...

Shalu, Uncle J, Bloody Mary, Bikramjit, Banupriya, Harshita, Moo & Aniruddha!

Go tag!

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

One of the most "Worthwhile" Day!

I think, today I compensated for the weekend that was spent in office! *Yeah, I was in office on Sunday too!*

So the day began with me going to the court as usual but today, I was alone in the court, I had the matter and the seniors were in office.. *it was a small little matter*, and therefore I knew that I was going to get free on time from the court.
I called up Shayon and asked him if we could meet for lunch, and voila, he said that he would love to! And we met and had a great lunch at a Restaurant called The Chinese! The best part of the whole experience apart from the fact that we both were the only patrons and were sitting in one cosy corner of the restaurant was that the Desert was on the house *Mango Ice Cream!!*...
And when it was time to pay, we realised that we were short on cash and their card machine was not working *actually they had already told us that the card machine was not working when we had entered the restaurant* but never the less they were kind to us and did not make us wash the dishes, and let us go to the ATM and withdraw cash and pay em off!

I reached office at around 2.15 ish, and started reading a new matter, the big boss was supposed to an Arbitration and I practically had no work in the office. I was whiling away my time with tit bits of research and lot of chatting online, and making coffee for the office when my immediate senior Ms. PK suggested that we go to this store in the local market behind the office.. and I gladly accompanied her.. we shopped *She was meeting her friend and she wanted to dress up, and I also made a plan to meet Shayon :P* and then went to the parlour.. *YEAH parlour* because she wanted to look human when she went to meet her friend.. and then, we rushed off to office picked up our stuff and I drove *her car* to Khan Market.

And her friend and Shayon were waiting at the same place, and she met Shayon.. and then went a floor above us, so that its not embarrassing for us *Totally SWEET*!

Then of course it was a nice romantic evening coffee that Shayon and I shared... and came back home...
but the cherry on the top was when I asked the auto waala to take a longer route to my house *Shayon was with me*, and he said "Madam, ghar jaana bhi hai, ki Delhi darshan kar rahe hain!" !!

Friday, September 17, 2010

Breaking the ice!

It so hard to be perfect, to go back to being what you were from present to a point back in time. But, it is never really difficult to be a newer or a better person. And if it is both, then nothing like it.

We all the know the most obvious thing which is that Change is inevitable. And if there is no change, then life becomes stagnant, and what becomes stagnant smells of rotten things. But then, it is so hard to accept the change that has come over you, over the other people involved in the equation.. but after the teething, we all need to, have accept those changes.
And, I am glad, that slowly... both Shayon and and I are ironing out the wrinkles that had developed in our relationship.
Today in the afternoon we had so much of fun. We were together for lunch, both had come from their respective offices.. and apart from the lunch that was by the way awesome *Nirula's Pot-pourri *, it was the easy talking that somehow was amiss in the conversations that we were having of late.
The awkward moments seemed to be dissolved in the afternoon sun, and both of us enjoyed the togetherness of being together after ages. The sun, that came out in Delhi after ages, actually broke the ice that the icky never ending rains were just hardening.

Both of us had had the 'talks', about what the whole mess had done to us and that how much each of us has changed, but then, in the last couple of days, both of us have been smiling a lot.. he has been in good mood.. and most of all, he is having fun at work too.
We talk about the most mundane things in life.. and the comfort of knowing that the cause of 'US' is not a lost one is always a pleasurable feeling!
The impromptu plans... the phone calls, the smses... they all do everything to make me smile and blush. And, I know for sure- Tomorrow is a better day.. and love is just going to increase!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Present: Right Here!

Hello my Lovelies! I am right here, I have not abandoned this blog.. and you are not so lucky that my inspiration for ranting out loud will just go away in a jiffy!

I have been unwell lately. Was down with fever and thus was not able to update the site. I mean, I was really in no mood to talk about body aches, and head aches and eye aches...
Not heart ache either. *I do not complain of acidity!*

So for the last six days, I have been resting, and doing nothing. And, I swear doing nothing is the hardest thing in this world to do. And the most that I would wish to trouble was my dear sweetheart at work.. which I had to control with all that I had within me. And therefore to pass time, I watched TV, yeah television.. and I watched all the daily soaps... loads of em!
And, I can't believe myself!

In other news, my cousin who is two years younger to me announced her wedding. And that brings me back to the topic of the Gift that Shayon had given me on my Birthday.
*I have not yet come around to uploading pictures*
Yeah.. so, Ahem.. I .. Shayon..
Well, Shayon proposed me on my Birthday, with a ring and the down on the knee thing. And, I was holding my cake in one hand *which was yummy* and it was the parking lot.. and my Birthday, and I was totally crazy Happy!
And, now, I have to go and talk to my parents. ASAP.
No more taking advise on how to do it, because.. they are my parents.. and they have to know it. And they would- Really soon.
The action that follows, may or may not be recordable here, but from you all, I need prayers, that things fall into place for both of us. Because, it is not that so much time has gone by, or that both of us have gone through a Bad phase and that this is required...
Because, this is what we Both want. To be together, and be together. Both of us want to start a new journey, and since every relationship needs to grow from one phase to the other.. it is time to GROW! 

Both of us need your blessings and your wishes, Especially me! 

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Pure Seduction

This is the name of a fragrance that I got on my Birthday, but really wanted to share the following lyrics with you and as soon as this song came into my mind, this title struck me.

"Kya Gazab karte ho ji.
Pyar se darte ho ji..
Darke tum aur haseen lagte ho ji!

Kadmon mein sar rakh ke,
hum yahin so jaayenge
Haske tum dekho hum khush ho jaayenge...
Jhooth hi kehdo ki tum bhi humpe marte ho ji

Koi nahin hum dono hai,
main hoon meri angaadai hai..
chale aao meri baahon mein,
badi pyaari tanhaai hai...
Raat milan ki tum kyun .
aahen bharte ho ji..

Kya gazab karter ho ji
pyaar se darte ho ji...
darr ke tum aur haseen lagte ho ji"

This is for someone special :)

Monday, September 6, 2010

Happy Birthday- To me!

Turning 24 is not an easy job. Its like with each passing year, you have to grow in responsibility! Or so it is said. I look in the mirror, and I really don't see myself ageing *Thank God for that*.. but on the inside you feel, the OMG of becoming another year older!

This birthday by far was the most special by all means. Apart from the fact that I threw a party and surprisingly it was successful... and that I cut four cakes.. and all of em were chocolate truffle flavour! And it was for the first time in years, Shayon and I were together for the 12 o' clock cake cutting, and he gave me THE best gift ever! To know what that is... well you all have to wait till I upload the pictures.

The day otherwise, was wonderful... I started my Birthday with Shayon and I ended it with him...
Its just very weird to feel 24.

I had Ms. Kashvi with me for a night stay, and Ms. D.O. was one of the first call me! It was so so awesome! :)
Uncle J's card was also really nice!
Another cute cute thing that happened was the Ms. Wicked Witch of West-  called to wish me from down under and it was so silly coz, I could hardly understand her... thanks to the noise around and her accent! Oh, and Shalini from Das Laben also e-mailed me her wishes! It was such a delight to open the mailbox and see her mail!
I can't thank enough to all the people who made my birthday so so special!
Thank you all for the lovely day that I had!
This was probably the best thing that has happened to me thus far in the whole year!
Thank you all!

Saturday, September 4, 2010

WHY do I even Bother?

I mean.. This is the second year in row and I totally know that this time also the so called Birthday Party is gonna flop.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Back To School!

Through the mirror,
of time,
I look.. and the I see..
Slowly I reach out..
And I can almost feel...

I close my eyes,
and I am transported,
back into a time,
when everything was- Grand!

The friendships,
over the gossips in class,
the leg pulling, which often,
went too far!

The washrooms,
that were more like,
the rooms to exchange,
notes on boys and on change,
in fashion, Mind You!

The crushes, 
that went by..
not even giving you,
a second glance,
and the friends,
who made sure that,
they embarrass you,
till you blush.. and get red,
like a cherry tart!

From the Uniform, 
to disregarding it,
from the exams to,
the annual days..
from competing to be the best,
to flunking in your favourite subject..

School days,
have that charm.. that,
even after years, 
when you pass by that gate,
You wish you could go inside,
and stay on.. and live that life,
over again.. 
for once! 
PS: I met a couple of my school teachers recently, and then, all of a sudden, the whole back to school feeling and nostalgia is getting me! So this is for my lovely schools.. I am gonna be a lil biased, I love AFBBS more than Modern.. Because, I always value my foundations that were laid in AFBBS... Modern just added one more brand.
But never the less, both were my schools, and I Miss my School! 

Monday, August 30, 2010

A Simple Wish!

Its my birthday in a week!
Not expensive gifts,
nor anything extravagant..

On the day when I can ask for a gift,
I want to reclaim...
My dreams.
My desires!
Happiness with soul in it!
Love, which is left me.
My life.. which is not ready,
to come back to me!

I hoped,
I lost.
I re-hoped, 
and I was slapped!
But, I am holding on,
to the thread of faith..
Blindly yes- But nevertheless,
it is there!

For faith I learned,
is the the Dark night,
each of us know nothing,
about the next minute of our life,
yet we live on, with all our might!
That every moment in life,
is Nothing- But an act of faith!

And for my birthday-
I vow to restore it! 

Tuesday, August 24, 2010


In desert, where for far,
the only thing that you can see,
is a mirage!
Even an oasis,
you would pass by,
thinking that it just another,
trick by the nature on the passer by!

I too am standing,
at such cross roads,
where even though you are real,
I don't want to touch,
and make you disappear!

It would be like,
been woken up from,
a dream that was as,
real as reality itself,
only to realise,
that the dream was,
where your perfect world is!

Its not perfection that I seek,
nor the wisdom from all the seers,
neither am I searching for that life changing truth,
I am just hanging on, trying to learn..
the truth about what I really want,
of the little world inside my heart,
and of a truth that my soul wants,
to talk about!

Saturday, August 21, 2010


Do you believe in Omens? Things that make you believe.. in a supernatural power of the nature and how all of a sudden, things tend to be better all of a sudden?
I know I am not making any sense here! But let me try and explain-

Like on some days, you get up feeling good, you know about yourself and about your life in general, and you go sit in your car, turn on the radio and voilĂ , the radio is playing your favourite songs and you get all the signals green and you actually have a good day! *These little little signs, that make you wonder about the little mysteries in life! They are Omens!* And, yeah for the detail analysis on them, you can go read The Alchemist by Paulo Cohelo *It is my Bible by the way*.

So, like I was saying that sometimes, out of now where, you get signs and things just have to happen.. nothing big maybe, but they do happen.
And, I really believe in these signs- and believe in the power that they have.
So, today, rather a couple of minutes back, I was cleaning my purse, actually shifting my purse *Yeah FINALLY! I have a new Louis Vuitton Wallet and a Tribbeca Bag to carry!* And I was also loosing a lot of old bills and papers when I stumbled across this fortune. This little piece of paper came from a fortune cookie that I must have had at a Chinese Restaurant, and for some weird reason it came in my hand! And after reading it, I smiled and realised, that this may really happen in the near future! *Sorry, can't reveal what it said, but it is a GOOD fortune* and as I was smiling thinking about this, I stumbled across another piece of paper, this time is was a 'Letter to an Editor' of some magazine, and for some weird reason I had cut that little note out and kept it... on re reading it I realised why- *That I am going to share with you* and you will also understand why I had kept it for so long, and I never looked at it twice for almost 2-3 years and today, I read it all over again.. this is what it said- *This was in reply to an Article titled "Odd Couples"*

In the arithmetic of a truly living and loving life, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing. Find the person who loves you because of your eccentricities, prejudices and differences and not in spite of them and you have found a lover for life. After all, the ultimate test of a relationship is not to disagree but to hold hands. When men and women are able to deal with their individual eccentricities, then love has a chance to blossom. If you decide to love a person with his or her faults, that's not a chance. That's a choice. The joy of married life lies not in finding the perfect person. It is in finding the imperfect person and sharing the perfect dream. We all stumble, each one of us. That is why it is good to go hand in hand.
                                                                                                                 - Surinder Marwah, Delhi

Such a big thing to say, to understand, put so simply for all of us to read and to think. You all know that, boyfriend and I have been going through a rough patch. And, now that he is on his way here, we both are having our share of apprehensions all over again... but when I read this little thing, I re believed in US! In the fact that we are going to try really hard to share that perfect dream with each other!
It is really easy to believe in love, to get broken in love- But it is very difficult to re-believe in what once has been broken, love especially! But, today, I re-believe, I reach out, to touch, to feel, and to have faith, in My love all over again!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

The Devil's Advocate

There is always a flip side!
To every situation that is there, there are two sides. And if there are no two sides to a situation, then well, I feel it is nothing but a fact. Straight forward fact.

And even though I had vowed that I would stay away from the controversy because I am a little biased, and I have been called as Kalmadi lover and what not, and I think I have a twitter friend who hates me because I am being a Devil's Advocate!
Yeah, I am talking about the Common Wealth Games!!
Which have nothing common left in them.. and which have probably enraged not only the citizens of Delhi but all over India.
I do not say that the end defines the means. As a matter of fact, I think that Kalmadi and all the corrupt politicians should be punished and should be made answerable for all the misery that they have caused to the aam junta of the country.

But, right now, I also say, that since the games are on our head, and CWG is NOT only a Delhi exclusive event, it in a way represents what our country truly is to the entire world, we should reign in our horses a little bit.. and should peacefully and with all the baahvnaa of "Atithi Devo Bhava" open our arms to the world and welcome them!
Just imagine the embarrassment that not only Delhi, but our entire nation will face, if the games are not held here. Delhi after all is gearing up for the games only? Right?
I mean, just imagine, that right now, thanks to the Games, we have the Metro, that is running, there are flyovers that have come into existence and there is a overhaul to the entire thing. The best part being, that these projects HAVE to be completed before the games.. thus, they will be completed and done with FOR once!
And, now in a situation when games are not being held, thanks to a million inquires, the work will be stalled and Delhi will forever be dug up and will be in a mess.
And, I seriously believe, that  Sheila Dixit did see some potential in our city and thus she worked so hard to get the games here. Unfortunately, the colour of money makes so may people blind. And, I wobt be surprised if all this hoopla may be cheap tricks of the opposition. What they forget is, that when they opine on something that has international importance then they should think of nation as a whole and not just a city!

I know, I am being overtly optimistic, but, like I always say, that our country run on the million Gods that we worship- Positivism may just help us sail through the fourteen days of games too!
PS: Yup, three posts are off. No explanations.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

The Countdown:Tuesday

On the way back from office,
I got stuck in the rain,
but trust me,
the time spent was not in vain.

The rain today brought me back,
the memory of us wading thru,
and you walking all the way back,

Thank God,
I realized,
that the day was busy,
anything other than that,
it would have been silly!

A little space of time here
and there,
and your homecoming crawls,
in my head,
out of nowhere!

As the tuesday come almost,
to an end,
I can hardly contain,
all the happiness,
as another day goes,
and you come

Monday, August 16, 2010

The Countdown:Monday

The sun filtered through my window,
making me sit up right,
and as the alarm went off,
it was another dawn...
and just another daylight?

No, I smiled,
I wont be blue,
yes, it is a Monday, but so what-
it is one day less to see you!

But the MAD MAD day
lingered on, and on,
The Judge in the court,
was also being a patient man..

I tapped my foot,
played with my finger,
and saw the clock, every few moments,
to just see the day go by..

And finally, its the long night,
the interlude between now,
and tomorrow,
another day less,
another hour closer-
To be with you...!!!