Saturday, December 31, 2011

Dear 2011...

Dear 2011,

I remember penning down my hopes and my prayers in the little red diary that I took with me to Mumbai, last year. I also remembering crying myself to sleep on my much deserved vacation, because I did not want to come back. I just want to live like I am on a holiday and that there is nothing else in life, but that holiday.

But most of all, I remember, jotting down the hope that I had from you and here on this blog page, I wrote:
"Hoping and Praying that this year brings with itself, happiness, success, wealth & health to all of you!
And above all, I pray that this year bring with itself, Faith and belief in the ability of loving others and ourselves."
2010, turned out to be one 'hell' of a year and I really needed some semblance of my little heaven with me for a little while. And I must say that you have not been disappointing in that aspect.
Actually, I wanted to grade you through and through the year in loads of categories, I had as a matter of fact written the entire post down in my mind, but that never really translated into words.

So I finished a quarter of my life. A huge phase of my life got over, just to kick start another. And you know what, just like I started the teens, when I quit the whole big party scene, this time also, I decided, enough throwing parties.. spending time with the people who matter the most.

Yes, I know that I did not grow any wings on turning 25, but I think that I learnt some very important lessons which I would like to keep for life. I am recounting them here, so that I can back to this whenever I feel lost about life and hope:

- About office & colleagues: I remember how happy I was about the people I worked with. But after the merger of the law practice with the big law, firm and me going there and rest of them staying there, and later the cold shouldering leading to the revelation of their evil plans to get me out of the way taught me that, there are no friends and friendships in an office. Yes, you can be helpful. You can be nice to each other, but holding your heart out on your sleeves for the people who can take advantage of all of that is a bad idea. It is good to have a great rapport with your colleagues at work but being superficial is the best bargain.

- About expectations:  Of course, this being the whole wedding year, considering that I have just been attending weddings through and through, the deal breaker in the entire thing was, that my bua, while mentioned all her friends who had come from all over the world to attend her son's wedding forgot to mention the name of her nieces, who ran all over the city to help put the wedding together. I know, that we are family, but a word or two of appreciation in front of the entire crowd, would have made me really happy. There is nothing wrong to expect, but then, you should be prepared for the hurt that you may get!

- About Friends & Friendships: I think that the most beautiful relationship is that between the friends. I rediscovered a lot of my friendships whilst making new ones. Somehow, the virtual world gave me another great friend Sharmaji (of Whatthefuckisgoingon blog). About rediscovering friendships, I think, friendship is about knowing and understanding what the other person is trying to say, irrespective of the distance between them. Therefore, I would like to mention here;
Kashvi- I have not really spent time with her. I just forced her to have dinner with me on her birthday! :) But I have heard that she is planning on to make it a point to meet one friend a week. I think I will adopt that resolution too!
Su: The busy mommy! However, I know that I have whatsapped her like at real odd hours, and she has nothing but the best to tell me- Always!
Harshita: Now, she has the knack of disappearing, but of late she has been around more often, normally writing about the things that matter the most, and sometimes not that much!
TUIB's: Sadi, doctor sahiba! I think, I can read her, and see her smile and OMG- Her cultural upbringing is AWESOME!
Then there is my COW, who randomly pings me, when ever she has a minute! I think that I had the most fun when I met her in Moo-mbai :) She has been one hell of a support system back in Mumbai!
Of course, there is Chandni, meri Chandni! Who incidentelly turns out to be connected to me through my younger sister! Talk about the world being strong.
Then the two idiots chud buds Pjs and VY, who have the atrocity to call me at quarter of 10 in the night, when I am half sick and drag me out of my rajai in these cold winters to just have a random chat!

I have learnt that, you don't have to be present 24x7 in the lives of your friends! You just have to be there, because you are friends and that there is a life that they lead apart from you and you also have a life beyond them. And there is NOTHING to feel about that!
*Of course PJ calls me and offers to build me a sleeping place at work!!*

-About 'Downloading from Torrent': I have finally discovered the of downloading the episodes and seasons of my favorite series (english mind you) and then get stuck to the laptop to watch it all. The lesson I have learnt is, that, you have to always move forward with the times, and learn to take risks. I used to be super finicky about using a P2P software, lest it spoils the computer.
But you have to take risks in life. Like it or not!

- About Jealousy: Look at the work Jealousy properly, and you will realise that it has the work 'lousy' in it. And I learnt, that you can either be happy about your life or miserable about your own life because of someone else's life. It took me constant conscious work and I am still working on it- But every time I get sad about someone else having more fun than me- I just remind my self about my own blessings and remind myself, that my happiness is about me and not someone else!

- About rediscovering love: Random conversations. Fights. Not talking to each other. Getting flustered. And, in coping up with our loss, bf and I somewhere, have discovered our comfort zone of being with each other and of loving each other. Not the intense, sexually charged love/lust, but just the fact that we are there with each other. You know, last year, when we were coping with relationship crisis, he had promised me that he will get my smile back- the original 'sakshi smile' and he did! That is the best gift that I got in 2011!

Life in general also, was mostly a roller coaster this year. It was about growing up, both professionally and personally. It was about coping with loss and rediscovering the love that I have for life in general. For some weird reason, FB was flooded with all the 'Happy Go lucky' sort of pictures and messages, that infused a very positive thought in you. And, I also decided to do it all. One way or the other. To live my life on my terms also, and not just on the terms of office alone. And, I have to tell you, 2011, that the whole idiom that keeps on propping up- 'Whatever happens, happens for good' really made it's presence felt!

In one wink, I can relive the entirety of what you were. And, yes, I am bidding bye bye to you, because, I want to open my eyes in the new year, with new hopes and a renewed sense of relief, that Belief and Faith are not just two words in the dictionary, that they do work wonders when you push yourself with their backing to make the wonders work for you!

Thank you for being the year that you were. You will be remembered, for all the reasons, bad and good, but trust me when I say that, you will always be etched in the hearts of the people as the year, wherein people and power became one, where India got the Cricket World Cup, where F1 came to India and where we lost and found treasures of the world!

Lots of love,

Monday, December 26, 2011

Dear Santa..

It is the last half an hour before the Christmas ends. The super lazy me, and the super busy weekend that it was * Considering that it was my mother's birthday today and I sorta asked her friend to organize a BBQ, while I spent time with my darling BF*, I could not write this post earlier.
But never late than never.

Here is wishing all of you A very Merry Christmas! May God bless you all with lots of love, peace and happiness :).

And since Christmas is incomplete without a Santa Claus, so here is a little letter to Santa. *You know, I am still the kid when it comes to writing to the santa*

Dear Santa,
Merry Christmas!! 
Now considering that lot of people call y bf 'Santa', after shortening his name, and that he has a nice paunch too, you are still the BEST Santa ever :) 
And, even though I am not a kid, and I did not write you a wish list, you still made this Christmas really special for me. 
I have always loved Christmas, and it is very special because it is my mum's birthday, but this year, playing Santa *The secret santa in office, where I played santa to one of my colleagues and made the whole lot of effort to make the card and pack the gifts*, I realised the joy of giving. Of making people go all, WOW! at the gifts, wishes and pleasant surprises that are given to them. 
I now, understand why you are such a jolly fellow. 
For so many years, there have been debates about whether you are real or you are not, but I have always believed in you, and have never been let down. 
Each Christmas, there is a present waiting for me, to make me smile. And the best part is, that, that present may not be a materialistic thing, but, it is there. Just for me.
So thank you. *I am hoping that you have become tech savvy and read blogs!*
Thank you for making this Christmas so merry for me! :)


Thursday, December 22, 2011

This year was..'about blogging..'

I did not blog that often, neither did I come close to the amount of posts that I had put up last year. But despite that, I think that I have shared the most important bits of my life with this darling page, and as I have often said that I have found the greatest friends here on the bloggerville!
Can't thank you all enough for being a part of my life in the most weirdly amazing way! *considering the unusual way that we have become friends!*

But this year, I think, that I have had the maximum number of new bloggers, who have been kind enough to drop on my page and leave their lovely comments and critique for me and this beloved page. Therefore, before the year closes- I just want to thank each one of you for being my readers and for being there to guide me, love me and scold me.

There are a lot of new followers, and it is amazing how many new blogs am I discovering. Yes, I am yet to update my blog rolls and feeds. But each one of you is wonderful!

Just quick one line messages for the newbies who have been the most regular here:-

Ria: Thanks a ton girl, your blog makes me smile the most.

Izidher: You are the super sweet girl who loves the simple things in life, be like that.

Chintan: MY God, if I forget to visit blogger one day, I know I have missed out on a lot of stuff from your life! It is amazing the way you write. It is so profound and yet so simple.

Raampyaari: The most famous novelist amongst my followers, I'll die :) You give writing a new twist! :)

Rachit: Dude- Awesome. Keep up the great work!

Alka: Gosh, your satire on politics is amazing. BIG fan.

Ashutosh: Writing what the heart says! :)

Sulagna: Super mommy! :) Keep up the great work!

Rohit: Great writing with good clarity..

Megha Sarin: Fitness and fashin freak, maybe, looking at her, I will be able to push myself!

Alright, these are the few that I remembered, and in case I have forgotten any one, then bhool chook maaf karo ji!
You have all been awesome. And I hope that in the coming year, I will have as much love, if not more from all of you. The old ones and the new ones :)
Happy Blogging!

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

One liner update

Okay, I see that my fellow bloggers have been very active, and I have to catch up!
I am going to catch up, soon!
In between parties, weddings and hangovers, I am swamped with work! :(
I have the 'guys' meaning friends from all over here and I am here at work, which is no fun! :(

Will catch up on the blogs, and put up a proper post, soon!
Stay tuned!
Lots of love!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

This Year was about... "grief and loss"

There is a silly joke that is doing rounds of the internet now days is

"Dear God, 
Your love for Films (Shammi Kapoor & Dev Anand), Music (Jagjit Singh & Bhupen Hazarika) & Technology (Steve Jobs) is now beyond all doubts.
May we suggest that you take keen interest in Politics too"

And how true is it. It seems that this year the profoundness of death touched each one of us in many ways. The fact that no one is invincible was reminded to us over and over again this year.
We lost the best in every field, from the guy who added the 'i' to the technology, to  a path breaking painter, a rock star- a life cut short.
The Ghazal King, the one person who made the song on the holy Ganges like an anthem.
And if it was not the famous that were dying, it was mother nature making us all realise that there are so many things other than the petty things in life.

The nature stuck in all it's might. Shaking the every day lives of the every day people.

This year, I know that I have re learn't the lesson of live. All over again. 

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Love is!

Some sadist out there must be sitting happily in his heaven! Because, he created the concept of love, and decided that he is going to let the world work on the concepts that he has left behind. And somewhere out here the concepts remained and the practicality of the entire thing parted ways!
And trust me, coming from me, a person who firmly believes in the concept of love and a happily ever after, there must have been a hard hitting reality that must have struck Me!

You know the romance doesn't last forever, but the fact that he or she understands your full stops in the smses also, lives on for a long time!

But the long lasting live based relationship not only requires a lot of patience and compromises, but it requires a lot of self restraint, because there is always  better fish out there!  I am not going to preach as to how, one can imbibe these qualities or run a relationship because no one but the two people in the relationship know how to run their relationship, and what works the best for them!

But here is the thing: you will go through a heart break each time you have a fight with your other half! Each time, a dream shall be broken, but the good part is, that you will always have bandwidth to build a new dream! Just remember, that, the new dream may or may not be drastically different than your own dream, that you had woven before the relationship!
Because, the number of people in your dream increase!
To think about it, we always make that compromise in every relationship, to accommodate peace in it! We just hype it when it comes to the special some one relationship! If you want it, you will take that first step!
Gone are the days when the guy ran behind the girls, aaj kal toh ladkon ke zyaada nakhre hai!

Love hurts, accept it! 
It is it's own medicine, 
an unfortunate truth, a
misconceived lie, 
take your pick! 
Love, dream! But above all- 

PS: This is in continuation to, or a comment to Su's blog post! 

Saturday, December 10, 2011

This Year was about... "Inqlaaab"


And social media played the all important role in making sure that things and issue become viral even before the people who uttered a few words could close their mouths to take the next breath.
I can totally understand why Mr. Kapil Sibal is so worried about the content that goes online. *I do not support him in his cause, I believe in freedom of speech and expression*

The thing about social media is, that even though last when people were crying foul over the whole common wealth games and all, this year, thanks to social media concrete action has been taken by people, and not only that, 'Riyaasten bhi giri' from the 'Revolution' in Egypt to the killing of Gaddafi and Bin Laden, not only has social media highlighted the problems, but has also become a platform for solid and educated discussions.

Whereas the world saw the entire middle eastern and the muslim states undergo a huge radical change, because of people, back at home also, the power of the people is at it's full force.

From Mr. Hazare, who ignited a small little 'chingari' against corruption, caught fire like a dry piece of wood on a really hot day would. And, again there were discussions all over the world both the real and virtual,about who what and why of Mr. Anna Hazare. And, like it happens in India, the cause got diluted over the egos of the politicians, it eventually did fizzle out!
But, the message of power of the people, went loud and clear to all the politicians. And trust me, I just wish that 'We the People of India' move beyond the pettiness that we keep fighting over,and actually stand together for a real cause.

The year gone by, has shook the people in power, because they are a minority, and has made them realise that, the world order is slowly changing. And change, it shall.
Because, like they say, 'Waqt acha ho ya bura, badalta zaroor hai!!'
PS: The last post with the of them is the bf and one of them is me. *I am going to still keep you guessing who is who* But the babies in both the pictures have such an uncanny resemblance that when I first saw the pictures together, I was like- 'OMFG', how can that be! 

UPDATED TO ADD: I have to read all the pending posts of ze fellow bloggers, but my computer has gone kaput again, and my sister is not kind enough to share hers. So pardon the delay!
*Sis in the bathroom when I am writing this*

Monday, December 5, 2011

It is good to be different!

There may be basic differences between the two of us.I really won't dwell upon those, but, yes, we agree that we are different people. Saying this, I also know that we both really want to be with each other, and that is more than enough of a resolve for both of us! :)

Saying this, I am gonna leave you all with two pictures and you have to in your comments write the first reaction that comes to you, after seeing those two pictures. *basically you have to tell me if the two people in the picture same or different!!*


Sunday, December 4, 2011

Re: Solution

This post is a reply to a post titled 'Solution' and its concluding part, written by Uncle Jack. *I suggest that you read the posts in order to understand, why I decided to educate you all on 'Sexual Harassment'*

This is one of the many posts where Uncle Jack has described an illicit relationship outside marriage. Here, the poor girl, because of the circumstances at home was molded in such a way that she became an easy target for any one who wanted play around with her feelings.
Yes, I agree, that the parents- be it of a girl or that of a boy, need not be their best buddies, but should not become control freaks. Times have changed, and bad childhood often leads to disasters later in life. But, that does not give any leeway to the victim here.
Whenever in life there comes a point, where one has to make a decision, remember- YOU have the choice to make or to not to make this decision.
Coming back to the post- We see that, the girl was able to move on with her life after her bf from college breaks up with her, but then, gets caught in the cobweb of deceit and blackmail thanks to her own boss.

Now, this is a lesson that I have learnt through college and at work- There is ALWAYS a line as far as office is concerned. And, as a rule I personally feel that you should never EVER get involved with people from your workplace. Not only does it get messy for your personally, but professionally also, there is a good chance that you are signing your divorce papers with your success!

Now, girls, this one is for you-
If EVER a colleague and even your boss for that matter, does ANYTHING remotely sexual around you, including sharing a double meaning joke- It constitutes sexual harassment. And under the orders of the Hon'ble Supreme Court of India, EVERY office, has to have a sexual harassment committee and a complaint box, where the victim can go and complain of the sexual harassment. [Read the details here]
My reason for talking about this is, that often girls for the fear of reprimand and the societal pressures do not really do anything about the male colleagues crossing the line in your weak moment and then using that to leverage favors out of you.
THIS IS WRONG! And, the more we as women play this thing down, the more we shall be subject to this nonsense at work.
First and foremost- Avoid any sort of a meaningful relationship with a colleague. Yes you can be friends, but the moment you feel that, the friendship is becoming the one with fringe benefits, stop it right there. Please.
And if at all you feel, that you are being appreciated for all the wrong reasons, PLEASE put your foot down. Right there and then.
There is nothing wrong in looking pretty. But being taken for a ride because of being pretty is wrong.
Say it.  *And please, use the laws for your benefit and not as revenge tools!!*

See, we women are seen as mere tools for men. The reason being that most women are taught just that. The situation becomes worse when even the educated women also behave in the same way as the uninitiated in our country. Men need to change their mind set. But, they will only do that when they are forced to look at women with respect and as human beings with their own dreams, needs and desire!
And, I really want to add here, that all these bloody beauty creams, which advertise that a woman has to be beautiful in order to succeed and be confident makes a mess for all the people advocating feminism.
And to add fuel to fire, even though the entire nation knows from their history that earlier Indira and Sonia Gandhi have been the two of the MOST powerful women of our country, they are still unable to look at women like intelligent beings!
Respect comes, when we ask for it. Put our foot down at the wrong that is happening to us and the women around us. The moment we put our foot down, nothing and no one who we don't want can touch us.
And always remember just because you wear western outfits, does not mean that you are available!

Saturday, December 3, 2011

This Year was about... "Weddings"

Another wedding post.
But this one takes us back into the past.
Since we are reminiscing the year gone by, it cannot be complete without talking about weddings!!!

I mean that was the FIRST big news of the year, on the very first day of the year. Rewinding a little bit more, I remember going to a New Year Party, where I was flirting with some random guy, whose name I do not remember. But I do remember that, it was a big group of gujju couples, and trust me- Gujju women, well, they drink and their men they flirt. Even in front of their wives!
Any ways, so after dancing the whole night and hitting the bed only at 6 am, I managed to miss the big wedding announcement that my brother made.. about getting married to his long time gf!
And, wham, the trend of the year was set.
The entire year, all I did was to hear about a dozen or so people getting married, with a realization, that time has just flown away. That, there was a time, when I was actually looking forward to, and thinking ahead of being a grown up,attending a friend's wedding,my brother's wedding.. all of it was a just a future that was yet to happen.
And when it did, it was weird at first. Then it became the hectic pace, the sole reason for all of planning for the entire year. And the trend continues. In the coming year or two, there would be 'couples'. In a breath, life has taken a leap.
I know, that I am entering the New Year, with loads more cousins getting married. HECK, my cousin is getting married in the first week of January!
So, now you know that there are gonna be loads of posts about weddings and marriages.. as I look forward to the year ahead! :D

What a Party!!!

This has to be recorded NOW!! Am just back from a office party which was held at Taj!

Basically a Client Event, where we let ourselves lose and get drunk!! And trust me, I have no idea about the amount of alcohol that I have drunk!
So, I get to know that this hot client of mine is my batch mate from school!! And another contact that my boss made in one of her networking trips is my classmate!
The world surely is a small place!!

So from getting drunk, to flirting incessantly with clients, dancing away in glory and being dropped by a colleague, who is like the sweetest person on the entire office- this has been one great night!
Oh, one couple from my social dancing class are big boss's friends! And they told him and his wife that! :)
And the other office, Ms. M, Ms. P,Ms. V and Mr. MDR were also there, and the best part is, that even though they did not give me a cold shoulder I was simply nice to them, like I am to anybody I know superficially! And no I did not feel guilty or bad about it! And I am happy to move forward!!

So one heck of a night!! :) I am very happy! :) and yes, I looked very pretty, in my black dress!!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

It is the 'Year END'..

And now that we have established that I can have an alternative career as a 'Wedding Planner', I can breathe a sigh of relief!
Someday,may be, some where I will realise this dream too! :)
I can't thank you all enough for the encouragement that you all have given me in my previous post!

So, it is December already.
Time flies.
And this year, from day one has been, a journey of self discovery, of lovely surprises, and losses which were beyond our own hands. This year shall be remembered on one hand for the fond memories and the exhaustion that it caused me, and on the other hand, it will be remembered for the sorrows.. but most of all it shall be remembered for lessons in life that are learn't through experiences.

And, of course, the world also underwent a huge change.
And all shall be discussed in the 'Year end saga', where I shall try and bid good bye to this year, with as much gutso, as I welcomed it. And embrace the New Year, with as much hope as I can muster.

Happy End to a Happy-Sad- Overwhelming Year!

Friday, November 25, 2011

Lets talk 'Weddings'!! *A user guide, or well sort of!*

Like Su said in my previous post, this wedding seems to be like a movie! And a movie without a critical analysis, is just another movie that come and goes.
Even though this was a FIVE star wedding at a FIVE star hotel, there were a couple of things that could have been better, and since charity begins at home, I should start with myself.

I should have LOST weight. Like really should have lost weight and I could have done a little better with the outfits. I mean, I am extremely happy about the clothes that I had worn.. but my whole lehnga thing sort of got things a little out of place. The blouse/choli was a disaster.
Here is a little tip for you girls: Whenever you are getting a ‘Choli’ style blouse with cross strings in the back, NEVER get the string fixed. If you have the leverage of tying the strings instead of fixed ones the choli will always fit you better.

So, now that we have that sorted out, let us get back to the wedding.

The fun about destination wedding, rather about weddings is the whole thing about shor-sharaba and the family (ies) getting together. So, if it is a destination wedding, then having the functions away from the place where the wedding is supposed to happen and ferrying people to and fro can be a bit of a problem. The whole fun of the thing goes out, because people are normally hurried into getting ready.

If it is a Punjabi wedding, where you want to have a traditional dholki and the songs, then make sure that your guests are involved and are interested in them. Having an open bar, on a pool side, where the guests are all over the place, and no actual place where you can sit properly around the dholki and jamaao the raunak is a bad idea.

Here is another thing- It may be boring to confine your guests to a five star property, but people, the guests are there to enjoy the wedding and not sight seeing at your expense. Also a Goan wedding is a dream, but having a sangeet function out on the beach where the law bans the loud music after 10.30 pm, is again wasting too much money. In our case, it was not only the venue at the beach, but also the cost of the expensive DJ and special systems for the silent party, which was very enjoyable to the youngsters, but left out a lot of older family who left by 10-10.30. That means, effectively for a wedding that they have come so far for, they just enjoy for 2-2.5 hours, and then because they are no longer a part of the party they have to go back.

In a five star hotel, normally your room tariff includes the buffet breakfast which is on fixed timing and if you expect the guests to attend the morning pooja then you should make sure that they serve late breakfast to the guests, otherwise encourage the other guests to enjoy breakfast and only have the family, really close ones to attend the pooja.

Now, on the day of the wedding, there are a million things that are to be put together for the ceremony, apart from sending the bride to the parlour to get ready and making sure that the groom is not running all over the place. To take upon hand to arrange for lunch outside the hotel- ABSOLUTE NO- NO. Even if you indicate to the guests that the place is 5 minutes walking and that they should take it from there, being a host you are expected to make sure that all your guests eat their lunch.
TIP: On the wedding day, there is a pooja in the morning. Most of the people who sit for the pooja have to sit without eating anything, and after the pooja is done, then they are allowed to eat. So instead of having a breakfast and then a lunch, have a late breakfast *because the pooja starts as early at 8 in the morning and finishes by 10* and most of the guests are just getting ready at that point of time. So a nice heavy late breakfast shall take care of the guests and their hunger till the evening tea, when the sehrabandi happens at the boy side and the bride’s sisters, friends and relatives are too busy getting ready for the welcome and getting ready themselves.

Yes, the baraat is TO dance, and enjoy. But also be considerate about the bride and her family who anxiously wait for the baraat to come. (This one, I must say, we got it JUST right. There was no unnecessary delay on any end) I just HATE the fact when the baraat comes in at 11 or 12 in the night. The guests who come for the wedding just come there and don’t even see or congratulate the bride and the groom. And it is distressing, to wait that long after getting ready. For both the bride in her dress and make up and the groom with his ass on the horse.
 TIP: It is a money saver too!! Get married in the evening, the bride and the groom will be fresh, and not cranky. And they will actually be able to enjoy their pheras and then continue it to a wedding dinner/ reception, where rest of the people who are invited will come to congratulate or eat the food. Basically, the guests will at least have a couple to bless and the couple will atleast enjoy their own wedding!

And very important, Friends are very important, they make our life complete, but in a wedding, close family and family members are more important. So, if the friends have to step back a little and push the family forward it is okay. Your friends will not talk about this or feel bad about it, but if you make your family feel unwanted at what primarily is a family function well, you will have troubles in the family. So instead of the friends giving uptight smiles at your family’s way of doing things, get them involved and because they are friends, you can push them around a little and tell them to follow the lead of the family members.

So after the fun analysis and tips about the wedding and the ancillary functions, here are some pointers about the things that really matter…

  •  Cards: Your wedding card will always be special to you. No matter what people say. So, think through not only the card design but also through the colour schemes and more importantly the content. ALWAYS sit down with the card guy and proof read what is going to get printed in your card, bad spellings and grammar turn off even the most expensive card. Also, doing the leafs in the cards is a less costly option, because then you can easily put in the requisite invite for requisite people.
  •   Accompanying the Card: Yes, you have the standard mithai and the matthi+ shaker pare box, but there are many more options available. It does not matter whether you want to give traditional or contemporary suff, just make sure that it tastes and looks nice. My bua darling gave some weird chikki with the card in a cute potli. The potli was cute but the chikki, was well cutting corners where you should not.
  •  Venue: VERY important. But it should be decided not only on the basis of the cost factor, but also on the number of people who are coming. Sometimes, a big farm house costs you dear because the number of people are very less and the cost of renting a farm huge, then in that case a five star or a banquet is cheaper.
  • Food: PLEASE. There is no excuse for bad food. PERIOD.
  • Entertainment: Very IMPORTANT. But again plan your entertainment. I personally feel that a DJ is not required at the wedding *NOT if you are getting married in early evening and following it up with a party* Especially if it is the whole raat ki baraat and super late night pheras. Background pipe music lovely, because, the baraat is tired of all the dancing and the ladki walaas are too busy taking care of the guests. The DJ just adds to noise and nothing else. Also, for the other parties make sure that your DJ gets paid for the work and not for just being there, if there is a 10.30 pm limit, make sure that the party kickstarts early.
  •  Clothes: Just because something is expensive does not automatically make it super pretty. R & D properly. Start early in the clothes preparation *My personal favorite place for buying value for money wedding outfits for the bride is Chandni Chowk and for the groom Ushnak Mal at South Extension*. Also, dear bride, don’t load up on the sarees. Especially if you are a working professional. You will end up not wearing them. Instead buy the clothes that you will actually use. Same for satiny lacy lingerie.. one or two for the special night are fine. If you are allergic to anything but cotton in lingerie, stick to it.
  •  A Good photographer:  The wedding is a life time keepsake of memories of not only of the festivities, but also marks a milestone in your life, wherein you start new journey. Thus, a great photographer is a MUST. There are the usual photographers who click the usual posed photographs, and then there are the new breed of photographers who click beautiful natural pictures and capture the moments that are real. Again, do you research well in this regard. Thanks to FB, you can go do a random search and find some great photographers at a good price. Sincere suggestion: Put aside money for the photographer. Trust me, when the pictures will come, you will know that each penny was worth it.
  •  Mehndi: There are brides who don’t care, but if you are like me and love the whole mehndi like a bride thing, then again, go test out. Do NOT go reccos made by other people. Put them on the top of the list of try outs but try the others too. Sometimes the random search helps you get better people at best prices. Also negotiate with them every penny that you are going to pay to them, including the so called ‘shagun’ that they always ask for. There is a tendency that they escalate that, taking advantage of the whole wedding situation. Also, discuss with them in detail the style of the mehndi that they will put on for the rest of the guests and point out the special people, like your mom, sister and whoever is super close to be put special mehndi. That ways there will be lesser chance of things escalating out of hand.
  • Parlour: Pre-bridal et all. Very important that you look the best in your wedding and the functions. But instead of torturing your skin with pre-bridal session for like half a year *and spending tons of money on the parlour sittings*, just stick to a proper routine with the products that you have been using and which suit your skin. Drink loads of water, exercise and lessen your alcohol add in some healthy food and sleep well, and VOILA you will be a million dollars without really spending those million dollars! If you plan to experiment with your hair- like getting a new hair-cut then, do it 6 months in advance, so that in case it doesn’t look nice, you will have some time for the hair cut to grow out. And if it turns out to be nice, then you can always get it done again J. Stick to your own parlour and your own lady. She normally knows how you like your eyebrows and how your skin responds better than a new place. Also, big names in bridal make often don’t listen you and end up giving you a horrible look on your big day.    
  • Booze: Very important in any party. If you are given an option to get your own booze, get that that with a license and you will again save loads!
Apart from these tit-bits, just remember, that you are getting married, because you want to spend your life with this person and wedding is just a tiny part of the entire life that you are going to spend together. I have seen couples stressed for weeks about the whole wedding. As a matter of fact, when bf and I are in the thinking ahead of time mode we end up quarrelling.  Marriage is a start of a new journey, try and start the same in the happy mode and not in the stressed mode.

Budget it properly, there are excel sheets available on the net that can help you list things down with the costing in easy heads. And communicate about how you want things and try and avoid Chinese whispers! When delegating work,  delegate it to the right people, so that you know it will be done and are not stressing about the whole thing... Enjoy, the preps and the wedding!

I hope I haven’t bored you with this post. Just trying to be helpful. Even though no one asked me to help.


PS: The day I announce that I am getting married, push me to read this mail all over again! 

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Goa Unplugged: The Wedding: Day 3 *The Finale*

Super sorry to give you all the wedding story in bits and pieces but I have been swamped in work!

This is the final leg of the wedding that happened! The analysis will be next!

Now over to the wedding!

Since the wedding was a punjabi wedding, as per the rituals. We had the early morning puja for both the bride and the groom! Separately thank God!

It was the one ritual where my parents being the maternal uncle and aunt played a super important role! And the pandit ji that we had was really awesome! But droned on and on! After we got done with groom's puja and put Haldi, which btw was Vicco Turmeric cream, I helped in the preparations for the bride's puja! 

Much more elaborate fare, because of the chuda and the kaliraas! Had this been an Indian bride, she would've broken down, as this is normally the big realization of the marriage in the wedding! But our bride was American ( with an American family) and all of em looked confused! The highlight of the puja was me the dear getting all the blessings from the bride to be the next one (bride) *I am telling you, the entire family is obsessed with my marriage*! She even shook her kaliraas on top if my head, twice *First time she did it, none fell, and then masi ji told her, we did not see you do it on Sakshi, once more please!!*! And finally, one did break on me! So good luck! To me!
And because we were all into this puja, I could not have breakfast! Just had a bite here and there! 

And then because there was a good gap of four odd hours between the puja and the next evening events, instead of trying to grab a bite, I just got into the pool with my cousins... :) 

And after the dip in the pool, we had to start getting ready for the baraat and sehrabandi *Time was  of the essence, but we still managed to not to get things started in time!! :P*
And ready we did get! All of us in sarees! And, barring my father, no one particularly said nice things to me after I got ready! He was the only one, who was like, wow, you are looking stunning, rest of them were very uncomfortable owing to the fact that I was in a saree and looked twenty five instead of 18! I think I looked very pretty!
And then there was the dhol and the baraat! And I din care a damn! 
Okay, so we got thru seharaabandi  *You know manage get his pagdi on, the sehra, which my Bua and I had picked so lovingly from Chandni chowk along with the kalgi, then there was the sarbala, my nephew, who got so confused and cranky through all of this!!* But my brother looked really handsome and *touch wood to that* Oh, and the dhol guys, they tied pagdi's for the baraatis.. which was very awesome for the americans... and then finally we got my brother on to the ghodi! 

Realized that the chane ki daal we had carried all the way from Delhi was useless as we had not soaked it! Made the horse eat some sugar and tied the waange and got the baraat rolling!

Now, I have seen my fair share of baraats but this one was different! We had dhols with a live dj playing in jeep right at the front! And then there were us dancing to some weird rendition of snoop dogg with the live dhol mix! And on top if it, barring us, the Indian cousins and kids every one including the groom had a beer in their hands! And there was the elder brother, who was carrying, a big bottle of grey goose and giving us shots! And then there was champagne too, yes in the baraat!

Finally, we made it to the mandap, got the bride's brother to get my brother down, do the milni!

Now, The mandap- was beautiful! Simple and classy decorations! The ceremony  was in the hotel lawn and the madap, had in the background numerous candles and lanterns! With glass hangings reflecting their light!

There was proper seating and yes, we were ALL required to be seated during the ceremony! And we all did! Since, for the obvious reasons- there was nothing else to do! And mind you, only thing being served during the ceremony was water, and nothing else!
The ceremony also had a Goam twist, these priests who were there, they did a mix of konkani, punjabi and vedic wedding, I think. But it was really cool.*If the whole budget thing would not have been a constrained, I might have considered getting them for my wedding..*  So we just sat and waited for the ceremony to get over while listening to classical background music by two sitarists who were there and admiring the decor! And yeah, we had the brides maids and the grooms men also, they came in before the bride walked in just like you have it in Christian weddings!! 
Being the sisters of the groom, Sister, another cousin and I did the gath-bandhan for the couple and also did a little puja there on the mandap!
Finally, after the pheras and the pictures, we were ready to grab some drinks and get something to eat!

But, we all had to change for the Cocktails and Reception! My father wore a tuxedo and oh my Gosh- looked super handsome! *That was sorta a dress code, almost every one was wearing a tux but for my dad it was the first time, and trust me when I say handsome, I mean handsome with a BIG H*

The reception was American, inside the Banquet hall of the hotel! We had our tables assigned to us with our name cards!*Even though we were right in front our table was Number 10* There were the speeches, which were good but which were also a let down! (will tell you why in the analysis)  and since this wedding was just about surprises, the one for the reception was the Flash Mob dance!  Which went well, except..that the cake cutting and champagne were forgotten! *there was another thing about me not being able to get my other cousins involved in it, because they were sitting on a different table!!*
I got drunk that night coz there was nothing that I had to do! So all I to do was to get my drinks and have a lil food! And crashed, in my bed!
My parents were wary of drunk people around me and sister!So they came back after changing to get us from the party!   And honestly, I was glad that finally, the year long project came to an end!

The pictures, ( I hope)  you can see here!

And the analysis shall come soon! I mean, it was a big budget wedding and there are things that could've been done differently! And who knows, my analysis may help some one :)
Cheers till then!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

It is a happy day.
I got a order in a court case vide which I got the case closed in favour of my Client.
I am very Happy!
And, now I really hope that my salary is increased.

Yes office makes me work SUPER hard, for a salary that is VERY less!! 

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

November Update!!!

Yes there are things other than weddings that are also happening my life. Please appreciate the fact that this is the wedding season.. and like Best Friend puts it, we are in that age group, where most of our friends are getting ready to get married.
So, yes, one of my closest college friend is getting married, making me realize that my time too is near. It is just weird though, because the whole thing that I will have to leave my house, to go in to another house and make it mine and live there, all my life.
The whole leave behind all your life and picking up the pieces anew is a scary thing. It makes me nervous. Because, I know that life is gonna take a 360 degree turn and I can't do anything about it. Because ironically getting married to the bf is one thing that I really want.

Office is going great. *touch wood*. There is work. And my kind of work. My only complaint is my salary. :|
I wish that they would increase it soon.
Since my desk at office had a previous owner, it's drawers were not empty. I would tell her to clear it, and she would forget it. 
Today, I cleared em for her. Put my stuff in it. And made the desk my own. In all respects. I am no more a tenant. I have become the owner and a part of the firm completely. 
Yes, bitterness at being cold shouldered by the extension office a.k.a previous office, does creep in. But I am managing. I am slowly forgetting.
There is the Delhi Judicial Services exam that is coming up. Since it is in Delhi, no point hiding it from the college batch mates, coz I have been told that my entire batch and the batch junior to me are all giving that paper. No, I am not hopeful at all. Though, I am trying to study very hard. 
Can you imagine, that me being a SRK fan has not watched Ra.One. Yup, I am upset. But now it is hardly on at any nearest cinema ghar. So to make up for that, I am going to watch Tintin this Saturday. At any cost.
I miss having bf in town. There is hardly anybody that I can go out with. I went out for a coffee today, after ages. :| 
And I have been told by a million people that I need to loose weight.. someone inspire me to get rid of the lazy me!! :(
Lastly, I have become super obsessed with the song 'Katiya Karoon' from Rockstar. It just doesn't get outta my head! And the weirder part is that, when it was released I just did not like it. I started liking the song only after I watched the movie, which by the way is good in parts. I absolutely did not like the second half. The movie could have been crisper and shorter. Somehow the dots just did not connect in the second half.. I absolutely loved the first half. It was just right. Nargis Fakhri, well, can't act. Ranbir Kapoor has out done himself. And A.R. Rahman is back with a bang. His music had become repetitive but in Rockstar, he has proved again why was he given that Oscar!!! Also if you go watch the movie, don't miss the dance sequence that introduces Nargis Fakhri, that has been choreographed by The Danceworx, the place where I danced and my dear darling instructor R was in there and I saw him shouted, 'Oh my God, that is R!!' in the hall in a loud voice!! :) 
Just a little help here- I need to gift a friend couple of ours something for their engagement- and somehow, can't think of something nice.. please suggest!! Thanks :)  

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Goa Unplugged: The Wedding: Day 2

So after a serious discussion about 'What really makes a marriage work' and well of course giving you all a preview about the wedding that happened in Goa.. it is only fair that I narrate the rest of the story as well!!

So the second day that we were in Goa, was the day when the guests had to arrive and the mehndi was to begin. I was rudely woken up early in the morning by my father, insisting that we have breakfast asap since the hotel will close the breakfast soon.
And plus we were supposed to shift to the hotel 'Alila Diva', where the wedding festivities were to take place. So, after having breakfast, the bags were quickly re packed and casual but nice clothes were worn for the running around. And trust me, run around I did!
The hotel, Alila Diva has a 'Diva Wing', which was totally secluded from the rest of the hotel, and that wing was given to us. The best part of the wing was- That, we had a lovely swimming pool all to ourselves, along with a 24x7 coffee shop and nice comfy rooms for all those who were staying in that wing.
The worst part being- That so many of the guests were staying in the main wing of the hotel, and me the great was co-ordinating everything. So, after running around for like, just 45 odd minutes, I felt like I had not taken a bath in like two days. Such was the humidity levels there!
So I went around to our guests' room with a 'Welcome Bag' making sure that our guests are fine, and that, they know what the exact time of the various events are and also where they should be coming for the events!!
After, making sure that the guests are taken care of, I made my dear sister get ready and go down, so that she can get the mehndi done.
The women doing the mehndi had already come, and there were loads who wanted to get the mehndi done first so that they are able to enjoy the festivities..once all the people gathered.
Of course, as soon as the relatives started gathering, and I got ready and came down.. there were only talks about 'Oooh.. Sakshi you are next..' fortunately I was looking super pretty.. and very nice :)
And, the Mehndi function which is primarily for the bride fizzled because the bride to be made a grand entry- super late. She was to be there by 12 noon, instead she came at around 2pm!!
The food on the other hand was very nice. We had 'chaat corner' as the theme for the lunch and it was a huge success!!
Of course we wanted to have a couple of traditional punjabi songs.. we even had a dholki for it. But, because the whole thing was pool side and half of the people were just interested in getting drunk.. it was not as much fun, as it ought to have been.

But the second half of the day/evening, that is the sangeet night- WAS AWESOME!! Of course that is THE night that I was to shine.. and I did. Actually both sister and I did! :)
The thing that we messed up on was our dresses. We were so fixated upon wearing a lehnga, that, it sorta spoiled the fun, because, I was looking really huge, and I had to tie the lehnga so high that, it spoiled the look!!
But, sister and I managed to put up and awesome show! I was to emcee the show with one of Bhaiya's friend, and well, that poor guy got to speak only once.. and then.. it was only me who took over the mike.. *ironically, the name of bhaiya's friend was ''Mike'' ;P*
My bua and Uncle's dance was a super hit.. and they still can't get over the fact that I was able to get two of their friends, my mom and chachi to dance together ... and then there was sister and me! We dazzled the dance floor.. and that is what the reviews are :)
We had worked so hard for this!!
This is the ONLY good picture of me at the Sangeet

Oh, and my 3.5 yrs old niece did an amazing performance.. she was so so so cute on the stage!! And then there was the performance by the 'Mumbai Clan', meaning the other brother, his wife, and their friends! They mixed three songs...
The best part being, that the songs the Mumbai Clan chose were especially for my brother.. and the ones that we the 'Delhi Waalas' had chosen, were for the bride to be!
And this was when there was absolutely no sitting and deciding about the songs happening between Delhi and Mumbai.

The Sangeet btw was at a beach side shack called Zeebop.. and it was a beautiful setting and all except that Goa, despite being a party place has a law against loud music being played in open places after 10.30 pm! Yup, that spoils the party big time.
So, party buffs came up with the idea of a Silent Party, wherein each one is given a wireless headset and the DJ plays the music and everyone can dance on it!! And we had 3 DJ's playing the music for us. We had a guy playing Hip-Hop, one playing R & B and one playing bollywood! :)
And that means that we had three channels on our headsets.. and each channel was a different colour.. so you could actually see what the other guy was listening to. And, yes in case you are wondering, it did look like a lot of loony people swaying like drunkards to no music!

But, trust me, it was one hell of a sangeet night, which I know, no one in my family will forget for a loooong looong time to come!!!

Btw- You can check the mehndi and sangeet pictures here.. I have been told that I look terrible.. a.k.a SUPER fat. So please refrain from commenting on those terms! :) Enjoy!

PS updated to Add: I had no idea about the code thingy, I have linked you all now to a FB album. I hope you like it. Thanks. 

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

What makes a marriage work??

Loads of my older cousins got married in the last five odd years, and every time a wedding would happen for all the obvious reasons, the topic would turn to the ones who are next in line. 
Of course I was teased, and there was leg pulling all the time, but every one knew that I still have time, considering the fact that I was still in college.
Now, amongst all the cousins, there are a set of cousins who we meet ONLY at weddings. And that is one reason why we are not close to them. Be assured, though we have heard enough stories about them. Because these two distant cousin sisters are very bright and intelligent young ladies.. you know the always on the the top sorts!
The older of these two is getting married too, next year. *I hope that it does not clash with the n number of other weddings that we have!!* And, her parents had been looking for a match for her for almost 3 years now!! And I remember when her parents started looking out for a match for her, a shout out was given to all the relatives including us, lest we have some one in mind for their highly qualified daughter.
And one of the first questions that my mum asked at that time was 'What is the kind of family that they are looking for??'
And that became a debate, because my cousin bua who had touched the topic here, told my mom that they are looking for a family of their own status.. and my mother retorted mind you stating that they should get her married off in a family richer than what her parents are... 

Now, I know that love does not feed hungry mouths, but, what exactly is the definition of financial security that the parents of a girl expect?? If the boy has a job and gets home a salary at the end of each month.. then isn't that enough?
Again, enough has loads of definitions.
I also understand that the parents want only the best for their children.. but the parents in case of the arranged marriage trust their choice and in case of a love marriage trust the choice of their children. The world has changed, and so have the needs. We do not live in times where lives were simpler.. as a matter of fact, we are living in a time, where petrol is costlier than beer, and inflation is at all time high.. but can having all the money in the world fill the void of being lonely.. or will a marriage work solely because there is financial security??

Tell me, my lovely readers.. if you were to marry your daughter.. what is it that you will look for in the groom that you would choose for her.. and in case the groom is of her own choice.. what are tick offs?? 

My grand father had devised an A to F formula.. which is one way of looking at goes something like this.. *Modifying it a little bit, coz his original was only for the selection of a girl.. I am gonna try and fit both the genders!!*

A- Age
B- Beauty/ Brains
C- Character
D- Dowry 
E- Education
F- Family

PS: The next installment of the Goa Post is coming soon :) 


Saturday, November 5, 2011

Goa Unplugged: The Wedding: Day 1

Yes, I am going to bore you all with all the details of the wedding, thus dividing the whole thing into days and events. I am a sucker for details.. but you are more than welcome to not to read the details. :D

So we landed in Goa, one day prior to the official start of the wedding festivities, after all we were part hosts.. And it was a mess to just get to the airport. There were 6 of us going from my house and two other who were reaching the airport from their house.
For 6 of us, we were carrying NINE bags. It is not funny. Trust me! Because these nine bags were just the check in luggage, there were the hand baggage that each of us was carrying too.. and for the two grand mothers that were travelling with us, well, I was lugging their hand bags along with mine. So, basically I was looking like a coolie.

IMPORTANT lesson, in case you are travelling with loads of people in an early morning flight, either eat breakfast, or keep your mouth shut. Because, we were so flustered about making sure that everything that we would need is there and is packed properly, we did not bother to eat at all. For some weird reason, I was very calm and composed but my usually calm and composed father was totally cranky and that gets us scary.
So a cranky lot of 6 of us reaches the airport, manage to check in and despite the our luggage allowance being 120 kgs, still manage to be overweight and thus end up carrying another handbag!!

All this while my father is super cranky and super grumpy. Thanks to the new food court at the airport, the moment my father gets his morning breakfast he is back to being his normal calm and jolly self, and finally the eight of us *two others have also joined us by this time* board the flight, and Dad blasts off again.. because, both sister and I wanted window seats.. and in all that confusion.. we all end up sitting separately! *Mom and dad sat together, both grand moms sat together and two others sat together and sister and I were on totally different seats* and because it was a flight to Goa, there were foreigners and there were weirdos.. esp the one sitting next to me! I think his girl was coming from else where to Goa and he was sweet talking to her all the while till take off! And then, as soon as the phones were allowed to be used again after landing he was talking to her.. and he had a weird hairstyle and was too much of an metro-sexual male for my comfort zone.. and yes he had a super fake accent.. and jumped between fake accent english to bengali.. like a jumping bean...
So any ways we landed in Goa, reached our hotel.. Martin's Comfort, a simple hotel for the night before we moved to the hotel where the wedding was! And after lunch... I went with my bua to the Wedding hotel, coz, the Bride, the groom, and my other brother with his family were staying there only. Plus, the Bride was getting her mehndi done a day before the actual mehndi so that she could have fun on the function.
The Dulhan's Mehndi (Designer, not ethnic Indian)
And, since, I was required to do the running around the whole of next day.. I jumped in the Que as well. Bua also got her mehndi done with me that day.

My Mehndi (Can you see the 'S' in it??)

The back of my hand

And, by the time it was evening.. there was enough confusion.. with the decorators not getting the decorations ready for next day, and last minute up downs!

The Sour part of the day was the Dinner. My sister and I were told, that every one including my brothers and their friends and all of us will have dinner at the same place.. a shack called 'The Pentagon'. It had a live band, and lovely food. The rude shock.. that the youngsters were at another place 100 mtrs away and sister and I were stuck with Parents, Bua and Uncle, Grandmoms and my other bhabi's mom! Because we were not told about the change in plans or invited at the shack.. I decided I wont go. Sister felt bad too! Esp since the groom a.k.a my brother and the other Cousin 'A' came to say 'Hi' to us, and did not invite us!

We did end up going to their party later on.. to catch on some drinks, because my darling chachu dropped in for dinner with us! :D
Sister had her first 'Kamikaze Shot' ever, that night! :) She has become an adult, officially mind you.. and we all had fun making her do her first ever shots! :)

But, the festivities were yet to start.. and the party had just begun!

Friday, November 4, 2011

I am blue

Post holiday depression setting in!!!
No, don't get worried, it is the lull after the storm.. no more phone calls, no more getting the clothes and the things organized for the wedding... so the silence is weird.
Even though there is another wedding to be planned *I am not a major player here*, the whole wedding in my house thing is over now.
The next wedding in the house thing will be for me. So no point hoping for anything else at all, because there is no one other than me who is left for getting married! ;P

The detailed Goa post, shall come.
I am still sorting the million things that I took along with me and getting the winter wardrobe in place.. it is chilly here!!!

Also, I promise to read and comment all of you all's blogs. I am right here, only a little disoriented!

Monday, October 31, 2011

Quick note from Goa!!

The connectivity here sucks BIG time. I have been dying to write really nice long posts.. but alas, my Reliance Net Connect, just doesn't work here!! *The phones too conk off*

Any ways- The most awaited wedding in the family, finally happened, and I am happy to report that all went well.. now, we are all relaxing, and trying rest up the tired bodies and rejuvenating the souls!!

Hope you all are doing well!!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Wedding Report: Live Coverage: Pre-Wedding-I

Finally, the bags are packed! :D
Well, at least, sister put her foot down and closed all hers and mine. Mom is still going on checking off her mental checklist. And, I am also ticking things off in my mind. This wedding is becoming a very stressful affair.
We leave home inc around 8 odd hours, and I am super jittery, about- What if we forget something.. though we have been very careful about everything.. but one can only be so careful.

It was sister's birthday today. And it being on Diwali did not flatter her that much. She was very pissed that her bf was having trouble coming to meet her.. but in the end he did manage to come.. so she has been the least cranky amongst all the women.

I well, am in a different universe altogether.
I will write more detailed post when I am flying tomorrow! I mean, this is the maddest trip that is gonna be.. and I am already tired.
I hope my polar bear mode kicks in and all the reserve energy kicks in.
We ll have worked very hard for this, and I pray that everything falls in place!
God Bless :)

Happy Diwali :)

Monday, October 24, 2011


It is a bad idea to get all emotional high when you are drunk.. especially if it is a week- night.. because you end up having a huge head ache, thanks to not only the alcohol, but also to all the crying and anger bouts!!
Just a tip!

The good things about my rants though is, that, I fight it out with the bf. And, he knows, how to handle me in such situations. So after, like 30 odd minutes of hearing me go all 'Blah Blah.. I am so mad at the world' he manages to steer the topic to movies and SRK.. and that is the end of the angry bird.
Well, the only thing that is nagging me about that night is the best friend's diamond ring.. some people are born lucky, I guess. I mean, she has the looks, and she is talented, has a brain of her own, and has a super rich boyfriend. Yes, I do get J.
But, then, I know, I have something special too. I may get really mad at people and their materialistic gains, but, I know how to find my happiness in the smaller things of life. *Best friend did not get the down on the knees proposal.. that I got.. even though the ring did not have the diamond.. it did have the intentions and the love behind it, that is WAY much more than what a diamond can be priced at!! :D*

It is the festive and the wedding season.. and after all the hoo hoopla.. my bua and her husband leave tomorrow for Goa. And, we have a wedding guest at our house too. And, it is the happy jolly mood, with a lot of women throwing a lot of tantrums around. My poor father can only take so much.
At one point today in my house, I had SO many people, that, it sounded like a fish market.. EVERYONE talking all at once! :P
The family that had come to our place, was my grandfather's best friend and his family. They are one big family *touch-wood*, who always come together to us on Diwali, or even on other occasions! This uncle, he and his entire family is that of lawyers. And, trust me, he was the happiest person, when he saw me in my robes in the Supreme Court. He strictly told my father.. that this girl is not going in corporate. Let her join the profession as is!

Any which ways, the wedding is almost on our head. I have all the jitters possible in my stomach. No, I know, that the wedding will be fine.. but then the newest song will start playing in the loop of the relatives.. 'Sakshi ki shaadi kab hai'  I have been cornered like so many times in the last two days.. actually in the last 10 odd days, all I have been hearing is, that NOW the time is right.. plan your marriage and get married. My sister is feeding fire to the flames.. and leaving no stone upturned lest, something comes up.
I have to like a diplomatic person, go around the question of 'So, have you found the guy or you want us to find you one??' Since, my parents have not yet made any commitments on my relationship and my marriage. My mother of course is on a completely path/page/universe.. I foresee a major collusion.. God help me here. It is going to be bad couple of days as far as my marriage goes. Brother's wedding, will of course be, one the most remembered.. and I really hope for all the right reasons!

I hope you all are having fun, preparing for Diwali.. and the festivities!

Friday, October 21, 2011

Rant- a Thon!

I am 3 drinks down,. It is my best friend's birthday.. actually it was her party that I got drunk in.. Thank heaven's that I had another of my buddies to drive me back.

I am very upset.
I generally, cry over these things, but then, I did not feel like crying. Instead felt like channeling my anger here. In this post.

My best friend got a diamond ring from her bf, for her birthday. And, you know what, I have not even gotten proper time from my bf. Yes, I love gifts. But, then I also love my gifts to be thoughtful... but you know, right now, at this instant, I am not craving a materialistic gift. I am craving my time. I know, bf will say that I give you all the time that you want.. it is just that I can't ALWAYS give you the time that you want. But, I feel that there has to be something wrong somewhere then.. because, I am always craving for more as far as time is concerned.
Just can't have enough of him can I.

You know the wedding that I talked about in my previous post.. well, sister and I had a whole 25 minute piece ready for the sangeet, but apparently my other brother and sister in law feel that it will be too long. Yeah, now, we have to ration out, how much do we perform.. for a wedding that we have been preparing for so long. Of course, it is their wedding.. we are just guests after all.
I am a very family person. Maybe too much of family person.
But for my dear darling brothers, who are like really nice and very generous otherwise.. when it comes to the most important things in life, it is their friends that take precedence over family.
And I hate that.
Don't misunderstand me, I still love them. A LOT!

It is just that expectations kills everything. Be it love, family, friendships!
All, I can do is feel about things. And vent the ire here.

Yes, maybe this is the alcohol speaking.. but, you puke your troubles out, when alcohol comes in!

Monday, October 17, 2011

The Wedding Expert!

It has been more than 10 days since I have posted last! And, first apologies shall be in order!

To my Dear Blog, I love you. You have kept me sane. you have given friends and have shown me a world of genuine people.. I have not forgotten you. I just have been a little lazy. *Which has become the excuse of the year!!!*

Dear Readers,
You have been absolutely amazing! I am right here, I have been commenting of and on, on the posts, nothing, just keeping busy!

And here is why-

I had been shouting myself hoarse from January, that, we should get our clothes, and our gifts and everything else in order. Today, we are less than 10 days away from my brother ki shaadi, and I have yet to see, ONE single piece of ANY of the outfits that I intend to wear for wedding.
And now, thanks to the festive season, the market has become, nothing but super crowded.. you can't move
an inch without stepping on to another's feet!

Since, the most exciting thing that is happening in my life is mere brother ki shaadi, the updates are ONLY about the mishaps to the wedding.. my dear male readers, do bear with me..
So, the dancing sessions are ON!
From choreographing dances for my Bua & Uncle, to making their friends and my mom dance, sister and I are just going crazy! I got the songs edited by a professional studio! Yeah, that is the level of commitment that we have for this wedding!
Talking about choreographing, sister and I are working SUPER hard for our dances as well. The only disappointment that I have is, that, it is again just the me and her hogging the stage, none of my cousins are ready to make any time what so ever! But since we are talking about dancing, I think, I can be a lil greedy and hog all the limelight that I want! :P

Add to the dancing the travelling all over Delhi bit, trying to shop, trying to close stuff, help my Bua pack the stuff, and making sure that we don't end up leaving behind anything that is required.

There are lists that are made EVERYDAY! I have NEVER in my life for ANY family wedding been so 'list' oriented!

Had I made so many lists otherwise in my life, I would have been one sorted person!

So, now, I know, how to even to a big budget out station wedding.. seems like, I can start my own wedding planning business- from taking people shopping, to choreographing the dances and entertainment, to finalizing the menus of the food.. I am pretty experienced.. and then there are the after marriage services, like getting the wedding registered.. and God forbid if things don't work out, I'll even offer mediation services along with divorces in worst case scenarios!

Quite a package I tell you! :)

I hope you all are having fun.. in the festivities!
Love you and cheers!!

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Reservation starts right on the Top!

A very insightful and an extremely educative discussion with a colleague in the office triggered this blog post. Honestly speaking, the, conclusion about the fact, that the reservation starts at the top hit me like a bolt of lightening and yes, it truly was a revelation.

We were not really talking about the reservation in the job sector , education sector etc done by the government. As a matter of fact, we were talking about the 'Vaman' avatar of Lord Shri Krishna, wherein the God had come earth to save the earth from a demon king.
You don't have to hear this entire story to actually know the moral of the story, that being, that Good always prevails over the bad!

Now, the thing about reservation here was, that, have you ever wondered that, all the demons and the atyachaari kings that the Gods have come to earth to kill, happen to reach Heaven? And that they become the lucky ones to be killed by God, and attain the highest order of after death ranking i.e 'Mukti'.
Now, the other cadre of people who attain this Mukti are the Saints, the people who have left their 'Moh' and 'Maya' behind, and have embraced the way of God.
But what happens to us?
The 'General' class, who are neither the Demon kings nor the Saints, who leave behind everything to embrace God.. why are we instilled  with the fear of God, and who are also told that in case we do not live in the fear of the Almighty we for sure will be in the cycle of million births and may also be born as low life's!

And, what exactly are we the cadre of General Class doing? Living our lives. On the norms that have been set by a society. In case, those norms are broken, there have been instances that have been publicized of those of honor killing!

Isn't it ridiculous, that the general people, the mango people, as we are commonly known, do only what is expected out of us to do- We are born. We study. We get married. Take  care of our responsibilities while struggling with the daily grind of life. And then we die. And in between all of this, we are not even guaranteed 'Mukti', because we do not fall in the category of either being a saint or being a sinner.

It is like sitting for your Board Exams and wondering that even if I score a 95%, there will be someone from the 'Reserved' category with lower marks who will get in the college, and then there will be no seat. And then there will be the super rich who will send their children abroad.. and then you wish that you were not the mango person that you are! Unsure about your future, because, you are what you are and not the 'Reserved' one!

But, then Reservation has been done by Almighty himself, when the Almighty can't guarantee you a decent life after Death, especially since you have done nothing extraordinary.. this is just your Life. Governed if not by the norms of the society then by the norms of the Government.. who squeezes everything out of you.. after all.. you and I, we are just Mangoes!