Tuesday, March 30, 2010

The Glass wall

Thin lines on the floor,
and that glass wall...
I see you on the other side,
but can't touch you or feel you,
right here by my side...

I go to that glass wall..
press my face to it,
willing you to look at me too,
you look past me,
into an oblivion,
that I can't see...

I shout your name,
the glass bounces it back at me,
I hear my voice in my ears,
calling your name, but you,
my dear cannot hear...

I reach out, across that,
thin line on the floor..
willing you to take me in your arms,
once again...
but what divides us is not that glass wall,
nor those thin lines on the floor..

It is our worlds that are far apart,
they were one, once...
there was the gray, no the hues,
that the colour pallet was mazed at..
today there is black on one side,
white on the other...

Light is where you are standing,
my love..
Darkness is which, is slowly engulfing me,
I see your last glimpses before it covers my eyes,
and tears mist them too,
Ah, there, I see a smile...
Now, I know, I can be in peace,
with myself too.

I wake up again...
not dreading another day,
I had seen you smile the other day,
and the glass wall today,
seems like a friend to me,
what yesterday was a foe..
That glass wall,
the one from which I see you..

Monday, March 29, 2010

Love, Sex aur Dhoka

I have not yet had the chance to go see this movie. Anyone willing to take me out to watch a movie, this or any other are more than welcome. And, yeah so this post is not about the movie or the various controversies surrounding the movie.
It seems that our little blog-o-sphere is itself headed for quite a lot of heated discussion and opinions about, Love, sex aur Dhoka.
The string started at this post by Uncle J, which was later picked up by TBG, and since most of the comments on TBG's post turned steered the conversation around these three words, Shayon came up with something of his own, and then Uncle J came up with another post combining TBG's and Shayon's views and putting in his own thoughts into it. And, to add more heat to the fire, we have Suruchi giving us more insights and then Shayon with his questions...
And that leaves me so confused. I know, my dear reader, this is loads of hard work for you navigating soooo many links to try to make sense here. But trust me all of them are worth a read, they invoke such extreme reactions in your head that you can't even imagine.

Yeah, so, now that you all familiar with, the basis of all the Love, Sex aur Dhoka that we are discussing, I have a couple of things that just struck me as soon as I closed my eyes, and I woke up again to ponder over em, and then decided to make you a party to moi thoughts.

I have been crying hoarse saying that all I have seen are love marriages around me, and such that even after years and years of being married these couples a still so much in love that, I am normally embarrassed around them. But, then, I have also seen friends breaking up in the nascent stage of their relationships because of either partner falling in love all over again.
Here, lets just put the 'Love affairs' aside.
And think of Just marriage, and lets be demographic here, and only think in the Indian Society Scenario, where love marriages are still looked down upon.
I have a certain friend (oye, owe up to this statement) who says, 'Sakshi, this is India, here, one falls in love after marriage.'
This is true, most of the marriages are arranged by the elders of the families, and two completely unknown entities are put together to spend their entire lives together. Now, even if there is respect and understanding by the way of compromising and by the fact that they are in holy matrimony.
What is the guarantee of actually forming that emotional bond? Of falling in love. Of course, you do get habituated to that person, he being your life partner, you have sex, have children and  lead a normal life. But, how does that justify you being in love. And what happens, when you find that emotional connect with someone, say in office or that neighbour... then where do you go from there? You have a family, and responsibilities, and then, you start feeling suffocated in your marriage and then you end up living a life of compromise.. Or do you?
I know we can have a La KANK scenario here, but then again, KANK was completely based outta USA, how many of us know of 40 year olds with proper families walking out of their marriage because they have found someone with whom they can really connect.

I say that a relationship based on mutual trust, and understanding is great. But, I also believe, that love by way that special bond, where you know that he farts after dinner, or that she has a compulsive habit of digging her nose don't bother you, and you still sleep on the same bed minus the children between you. And that you can actually talk to each other, about your true feelings and not just about children, finances and parents. And, when the relationship is like this, you can't really go wrong.

Infidelity is a different ball game all together.
Even in relationships that are air tight, there are chances that one can go wrong. And we cannot really preach anyone or tell any one what to do in such a situation. I have always maintained my stance on a very simple fact, that, The best people to make a decision in a relationship about a relationship is no one but the two people involved in that relationship. It is completely their call. It is they who know what the other person went through, when he/she took that step, and what made him/her do that.

No one can really predict, where and how would you connect with another person. In the internet generation we have love stories coming out of twitter, my own was thanks to a social networking site.
Love is love.
It can happen to anyone, any where, and You can't control it. It controls you.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Rose Coloured Glasses

I was born with a beautiful set of Black eyes,
I was told that the world is a beautiful place,
and that my eyes will see it as the time passes by..

I was told to wear the rose coloured glasses,
the day I started to ask my first questions,
about life and the world at large...
I was told,
the rose coloured glasses are to,
protect my beautiful black eyes...

I said that, I don't like them,
they seem to paint the world in a single,
rose colour..
They told me that the world is a bad place,
but the rose coloured glasses would keep it more serene...

I was glad that joys were always a part of my life,
the glasses hurt my nose,
I took them out once a while,
but then my eyes shook out tears,
the world became painful,
and my head spinned...

They told me to always wear my rose coloured glasses,
it would they said,
hurt my nose but keep my heart,
my soul away from pain and sorrow..

And today they took it away,
rudely I must add.. told me,
that now I am a grown up...
that the rose coloured glasses now belong to,
the little ones that are on their way...

I am left alone,
on the sidewalk, with the harsh sun,
I can't seem to focus...
all seems bright, but nothing;
seems cheery...
I miss my Rose coloured glasses,
the world seems to be hurting me...

They tell me,
I will grow numb to it... Harsh realities are a part of life,
I look at them, in sheer disgust,
I hated those damn glasses anyways, but you told me,
that they will keep pain and sorrow away...
NOW WHAT? I question them...

The rose coloured glasses are gone babes,
this is life-
and they leave me with this...

Friday, March 26, 2010

With a Lil Luck..

I hope that things work out for the best.
My family and I are in the ' Bad Luck' phase. Individually.

My life is any ways in such a mess with the admissions and the what not happening in my personal life. My SOP for the college admission is still stuck at one point. I can't seem to add anything at all to it. NOTHING. NILL. NADA.
The heat is not doing anything to help. It has already ruined my skin. All I can feel is rough skin on my face. My arms are ruined coz of the allergies and summer gets me itchy itchy scratchy scratchy all over. So, am mostly covered in red scratch marks in the heat.
Add to that double batch of dance classes, and tutions that I have started taking. And there is a certificate program in a subject of law that I have enrolled myself in has started. Oh, and then well, I had gone to get a draft made in the bank today and it it took like hours, and as I sit and type the post, the draft is not ready. I will have to go and collect it, IF the systems are up again.
Stupid banks, and stupid systems which they refuse to streamline.

I seem to have SO much on my pate, that instead of digesting it, I am going to puke everything. I am getting angry at people like there is nothing in this world that is right.
DAMN, I am a MESS.

And, my parents are having a hard time too. Their cars are a mess. My poor mom has already been stuck in the middle of the road twice in the span of two days once her car got punctured and the today, dad's car's radiator decided to go for a toss, when my mom was in the car on her way to meet her friend.

Oh and did I add, that, the fan in my room was not working for almost the whole week.. so I was sleeping in a fanless room.

And, well, the world has gone mad and crazy. That is it. BLAH LIFE.


Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Touched by an Angel...

The morning that filtered in my room,
the smile that played along my lips,
the sweet dream that refuses to leave me,
in the wee hours of morning,
I know, I was,
Touched by an Angel...
Last night....

The nightmares are scared,
they are lost in the gloom of,
moonless night...
the stars are smiling down at me,
slowly encouraging me to look,
to see, to feel... and to engulf,
I know, that I will be,
Touched by an Angel...

I did not know..
that life often disguises itself,
that love can have forms that are,
way beyond the realm of the
Universe, the Gods and the mortals..
I know, that, I am,
Touched by an Angel...

I look in the mirror,
I see my eyes, and I see,
a life, that was fizzing out in style,
a smile that is playing across my lips,
lighting my face, like the new moon,
after a darkened night...
I know, that, I am touched by an Angel..

The road is still not clear,
the confusions loom and glare,
but slowly, the breathing in,
it seems to be in sync..
Who rules- heart over mind?
Mind over heart?
A question, Only time will answer...
Today, I know, I was,
Touched by an Angel...
I feel Beautiful again...

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Mission Impossible: Admission

Anyone who thinks that studying is easy, is not a fool. Like, to actually study in your field is easy. It is the damn admission procedure that really kills you.
There is a very famous saying about IIT's, it is said that getting admitted to an IIT is more difficult than to actually survive the institute's rigorous training.

I beg to differ.

It is GODDAMMIT difficult getting admitted everywhere. Making life simple is NOT the purpose of any admission procedure. Every year, there is SO much confusion whenever the undergrad admissions start. Understandable, it is the first time that the kiddos are getting admitted and all...
But what is with the admissions to the Masters...

I have been trying like crazy to get couple of things together for my applications to the masters program.. and everything is so muddled up.
The damn thing needs so many papers and so many essays that, it feels like I am doing an English Assignment rather than applying for a masters course in Law.
The statement of purpose has not gone beyond 3 paragraphs... and well, the recommendation letters are so drab that, I feel that there is nothing significant that I have done in the last five years that I have done. No, it is not entirely my fault, it is the same format that the college uses for all the students, any change is welcome, but then the evaluation is not by the college, or the teachers but by the students themselves.
This is India, and only here can this happen.
So, mission admission which is looking like a HUGE failure is on its way...
Wish me luck and pray for me...

Saturday, March 20, 2010

The world is a Happy Place...

I have not written in quite some while. Seems like, slowly the words are going out of mind... the thoughts are turning, and running, and churning inside my mind, but nothing seems to come out when this blank page is open.
The world around me is a happy place.
Friends are getting hooked up and all set to get married. Friends are getting great jobs in the cities of their choice. There is enough work to keep most of the junta around me busy and content. The sister is on a school trip, where she and her friends have managed to click 700 photographs in like 2 days. It is going to another two weeks to just collate the pictures from the forty cameras that have gone on the trip. Oh, and she has made all of us really proud... I remember praying to God for passing me in my 11th grade, and she is amongst the top three in her class. Mom came back from her parent teacher teacher meeting in such happy mood that, my oversleepng was overlooked.
Yeah, the world is a happy place.

Outside there is happiness,
inside a turmoil..
As the sun sets every evening,
there is nothing really to look forward to,
in the next sun rise...

Slowly passions within,
are whithering away... 
giving way to fears that had..
long been forgotten and buried away..

In the darkest hours of the nights,
the tears roll down my cheeks,
the pain sears my heart,
as I battle to keep me sane..

This is not a war that I have lost,
'tis I know,
just a battle in the long lines of many to come,
just, lost the passion to fight..

Yes, the world is a happy place to be,
just not happy enough to squeeze
the pain out of my heart...
to put that smile back into my eyes,
and to give me back my passion,
to fight my life again...

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Advice for free, any takers?

Oh, you are looking for a shop are you? Well, there are enough in everybody that you really don't need to go to your district shopping centers to look for the above sale.

I belong to a country where the person in front of you may not have a single penny to afford his next meal, but he will always have advice ready for you. Indians are a bunch of opinionated people. (Had I not been one myself, I would not have been writing this post or blog). And somewhere in between all the free advices we forget the concept of personal space and liberty.
It is still okay if it comes from friends, certain well wishers, relatives, parents.. but when it comes from complete strangers who do not value any feedback, you get THIS. (Please click to know the issue first hand).

Most talked about, or rather the most controversial bit of free advice that is thrown around is when people talk about sex in open.
The moment this three letter word is uttered even in gender sense, the eyes go rolling, tongues go wagging, and the eyebrows are raised. Obscenity in the form of lip pecks in Bollywood movies, and small small clothes of our actresses and the usual gali galoch, they all are against our morals.
And, anything in real life... well, ohkay wow... We have the entire moral police up in arms.

Here is the deal, we come from the land of Kamasutra, we are the people who had 'kothas' and a rich tradition of royalty that has always been polygamous in nature.
This is the part of our rich culture, something that foreigners are very fascinated by, and we are ashamed off. (Oh yeah, we totally believe in double standards)
Then there are people like THESE who would say that, Hindu Religion and Lust, and crap crap crap.
You know, I am surprised, at the amount of moral policing that happens in the name of Religion.
Poor God must also be thinking and wondering, in which factory did he make such moronic defected, demented minds.

The first lesson in being a good citizen of a country is to respect its heritage , culture and past. Because that is what makes the future. And, in the 21st century when, we are in the process of actually finding and knowing the exact moment when earth came into existence thanks to the scientific advancement, talking about sex, and making love, one of the most natural desires of being a man in open should not be a taboo. AT ALL.
Apart from the fact that what you talk about in your personal space is your own prerogative, today we are in different times.. and no amount of development, modern cars, english/american accents can help us move forward as people unless we change our mindsets, our perspective, and come out of the era of antenna televisions into the era of Digital Televisions.
Change in mind is something that can't be forced upon a person, but a person can only be expected to open his mind to everything that is around him... and ofcourse, there is knowledge. Knowledge can well open your eyes.
I am no one to lecture, but, I do feel bad, when people, young people make flaws in their judgement because of lack of knowledge and perspective.
Time to really grow up.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Fast Track

Life is not the titan fast track ad. It is not really even a game. Actually many people, especially in Hindi movies call life a game, and then they set up the whole game plan.. blah blah

But, real life is so different from reel life. There is no intermission. It is an endless journey, where even the most planned move can go wrong in a fraction of a second and then you are left with nothing. Nothing. Nil. Zilch. And you are left on a cross road from where you can't turn back, and you can't really move forward. You are stuck. 
Life is such a bitch.

In the last couple of days, my close friends, have been urging me to move on. And, when I look at them, they give me those re assuring looks that say, 'Go on we are right with you' , but then, they forget, that, they can be there for me all that they want, but, they can't help me get over my pain. No, nothing can.
There is a friend of mine, who on reading this would get really mad. You know who you are, and you would say, How can the pain stay forever? Doesn't me being there matter at all to you? 
You have been the greatest support. Totally.

But, how can I forget my first kiss, Ever. The first, holding of the hands. The first time I ever looked into his eyes and smiled like crazy girl drugged in love.
Those first times are the last to let go off. The pain will subside with time. I am trying so hard not forget how to smile, and how to be the bubble gum that I always was.
It will go.
Let time be the healer.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

What are your dreams made of?

The shadows of dark slowly climb on,
the stars in the sky twinkle a haunting tone,
the moon is throwing a light,
that takes me to another world..

The world in another realm,
the world of improbable and
a parallel universe of Possibilities..

What are your dreams made of?
Of, scintillating destinations,
and fantasies woven out of this world,
of beauty that can't be captured either in words or pictures,

Of success that is beyond your imagination,
of love that is beyond the world that
we stay in,
of a life that is nothing but content..
of a happiness that is life,
and life that is happiness...

You are taken up there,
you are thrown back on the ground,
for every coin has its two sides..

What are your dreams made of?

Of sleepless nights,
and ghosts of past,
present and
the future...

Of the lost causes,
and your world falling in pieces,
of a life that is lived unfulfilled,
of destinies that are left,
behind in the memories of time.

of the if's and the but's
that could never be the surety..
of wishes,
that were just a part of a wishlist.

of broken hearts,
and shattered glass...
of love,
the labor of which was just lost.

of faces that smile,
and hearts that are full of spite,
of friendships that are nothing,
but vanity personified...

A blank piece of paper,
a fresh start...
is that what my dream is made of..
tell me thee...
What are your dreams made of?

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Cherry on the top..

My dear readers are well aware of the events of the past week. I have not been having the best time of my life. It has been a bad couple of days.
Add to that, my rashes.
I had rashes in the inner elbow of my right arm. I ignored em for over 3 months, and now finally, I did get to the doctor. Am having medicines for the same. Antibiotics more like it. Oh, and he told me, take the meds for a week, if the rashes don't go, then well, I'll just give you a stronger dose. DAMN.
I am having antibiotics, and despite those, I manage to catch cold, cough and fever. Oh yeah, this happens to me. ONLY me.

And my father has lost it completely. He all of a sudden doesn't like me going for my dance classes. He says you are spending wayyy too much time there. Oh, God, someone tell him that, I am a big girl I have friends there, and that, I just don't go there for dancing. Of course, ogling at R, is a good enough reason, but, I have other people with whom I talk and interact with.
If it is in my parents hand, my social life would be ZERO, zilch, nada.

SOMEONE, take me out of here. Give me a direction, and GET ME OUT OF HERE. I need a LIFE. Like really. On my own terms.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Belan in the Parliament...

So, the much celebrated, and the much controversial bill about the reservation of Women in the Parliament has passed.
As of Now.
The poor bill has gone back to its original state again. That is, more and more stormy weather, before it actually becomes a reality. But, as soon as the the bill was passes in the Rajya Sabha, reactions came in with such extremities that, I got really scared. I was not surprised when the reaction came from fellow bloggers also. After all blogging is the only community wherein you know that the other person is not being paid to write, especially on your personal blog.
So, back to the topic- Chanz did this post, which prompted me to write this post.
Chanz, what Mrs. Gandhi meant was, that, it is an opportunity that has been given to all women at large. Anyways, the one reaction that I have gathered is, that, the women feel that, now parliament will become more of a puppet show with the better halves directing the women in the parliament.
Another interesting thought that came in my mind was, that now, apart from kholapuri chappals, chairs etc, there will designer sandals and belan also flying all over the parliament house.
I know its not a good picture at all.
I am woman myself. And, I would be a cynic too, when it comes to reserving stuff for us. I mean, why, arent we equal in the society.
Yes, we are. But- (Yeah, there is always a BUT... ) we have been suppressed too long. There are women in this country, who are well educated, being married to rich men, who get beaten up every night by their husbands and they do nothing about it. They know everything but still choose to stay mum. That is because, they were always taught that they are the women.
I think, that this opportunity should be utilized by the women and they should actually break the shackles and he myth, that a woman cannot think or act independently. And we as voting women, of course can make sure that when ever the election happens, we vote for those women who have a brain where it is supposed to be, and a mouth that opens, when required.
I know, tough task. But, lets give them a chance, maybe, just maybe, instead of a belan, we have a disciplined session of the parliament...
Yeah, I know, we all are cynics when it comes to our Sarkar. But have faith in God, he has done his bit thus far, he will do it in the long run too.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

55 words or Less : Freedom

She stepped out and died. Opened her eyes to free air, free sun and freedom. But the bird had forgotten, that, her best friend was the open sky and not the cage where she had been confined all her life.
Does this even qualify for 55 words or less? Please react. This is MY first attempt.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Cost of Living

You would have thought, that you are the bundle of joy to your parents. Of course you were. When I was born, the times were simpler. (I know, I sound old, but, trust me when I see my sister, I really believe in in the term, 'When I was born' )
I mean, there was no cable T.V., heck, DD2, was launched when I was 7 maybe. There was school, there were simpler birthday parties, and there was a concept of Holidays, yeah, like summer vacation in the hills.
But today,
The parties have to be themed, there has to be a digital television provider, there are over 500 channels in ever imaginable language, in every kind of genre that you can think of. There is the computer, which has made sure that, world is shrinking.
And, you work your ass off, and still crib, like really crib about the lack of money. I totally believe that, all of us have become such complex beings, and so, so, into the materialistic life that we have actually stopped really looking around.
I feel so bad, that, when I do my basic research on houses, house loans and dream of owning a house, of my own, its scares the hell out of me thinking, how the hell will I be able to afford one. Everything has become so expensive, that at times, I feel like an idiot to even ask for money from my father. I feel ashamed to use his money for my extravagance of eating out with friends. I mean, I avoid going to college, so that, yeah, I don't end up spending money, unnecessary.
You know, whenever, I hear about pay packets of my friends, and all, I feel so nice, always so happy for them that they are earning money. But, as soon as they start earning, they realise their cost of living-
Which is DAMN expensive.
And thus all our life, we try to make it beautiful, for people we love. Not really us. And, in the end, don't even have time to look around, and really live the life that we were always hoping for... or do we?
The world looks scary out there.
The practicalities, are pretty much giving killer looks, and if looks could have killed,
then, well, I am a ghost and BOO to you all!!!

Sunday, March 7, 2010

I am the Woman

I am the womb that gives life to earth,
I am the heart that beats,
not only for me,
but for all , who are connected to me.

I am the one who bears the pain,
not only the one I have,
but also,
the one you have.

I start from being a daughter,
then go on to become,
a sister,
then the wife,
and then, The Mother, who,
brings about the light and the life...

Love comes naturally to all of us,
the unconditional part,
He gave only to us.

I have been beaten,
killed even,
murdered more like it,
even before I open my eyes to this world,
burnt for money...
raped for pleasure...

I am the Woman,
What is it that I expect from the world which I have made?
A little respect,
in return for all the love I have given you,
till date.
Happy Women's Day to all the Women in this world. This little poem is my way to say, that Yes, I a woman, and I love you, for all that you are, but, all I ask from you, is a little respect in return. Its a shame that we have to fight for our rights and have a special to celebrate the woman in us. Especially in a country, where, Goddesses are worshiped. 

First Love

There is something about first love. Its like the first rain in  the monsoon which cleanses you and scrubs the earth clean. Its the smell of the earth of that very shower.
Its about the first kiss that leaves you breathing hard, and the sensation of holding hands for the first time and feeling that current go through your body. Its about that hug which makes you feel special, or that look which tells you that yes you are special.

And you know there is something about first love, that will always make you smile. Be it the stupid fights, even more goofy things that you end up doing. It is that love which is the most pure. The one where you not only give your heart but also your soul.

Yes, call me a romantic at heart. Call me a fool, but then that is how I am. And that is how, love is, and love always will be for me.

I know that I am sounding a hopeful and a hopeless at the same time. But, then, this is one quality that only love can give you.
It is only when you fall in love, you discover yourself, the facets of your personalities that you can never really discover otherwise. The strength to cry all night, to laugh all night, and to look at the sky, the moon and the stars all night and then actually put in productive work the next day.
The smile on your face, the glow in your eyes, it gives it all away, but then you are always coy to hide it. To keep it safe from the world.

The thing about first love is that, it is the ONLY true love that you will ever find. All the rest, can touch your heart but never your soul...!!! 
Updated: Escapist wrote this poem today, and its such a coincidence that, its on the similar lines as this post.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

I know that this is going to come as a HUGE surprise to everyone on the blogosphere, especially those, who have known me for the last so many years.
The decision that I was talking about in the last post was, well, without,really, going round and round is,
Shayon and I, are not together anymore. We decided to part ways.
I have no explanations to give.
I don't know, what to really say.

That is it I guess.
And, for all the obvious reasons the comments on this post are closed.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Times in Life

There are times in life, when you make such decisions which have no basis. They are right and wrong at the same time.
There are times in life, when you are tested.
I think, I have been tested long enough. But, not surprisingly the test continues.
This by far has been the most painful.
I have no idea how am I going to go through this.

But, I know, that, I have to breathe. Breathing makes it easier.

I made the decision. I have hurt the other person, but, I am hurt too.

I don't know when the pain will go.
But, to a lot of people, I know, it matters that, I smile.
And someday, I hope, that my smile will reach my eyes, and that my laughter will be carefree.

'Cause there has always been heartache and pain
And when it's over you'll breathe again
You'll breath again
- Crash & Burn, Savage Garden

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Chinese Japanese Silly Tag

Yes, I got tagged.
TBG did this. So get bored by knowing me a little more.

8 TV shows/News Channels I like to watch 
  1. Friends
  2. Full House
  3. Hannah Montana
  4. Suite life of Zack and Cody
  5. Balika Vadhu ( I am not a cool girl)
  6. So you think you can dance?
  7. Dance India Dance.
  8. Koffee with Karan (Including the NUMEROUS re runs)
    8 Places to eat and dine
    1. 56 (In Gurgaon) - This is THE best Italian food on earth.
    2. Chungwah (G.K. II, M block)- All time favorite chinese.
    3. Sagar (Defence Colony)- You can't beat the South Indian here. And Kulfi faluda for desert- YUM.
    4. Big Chill (Kailash colony)- Junk italian and sumptuous desert menu to die for.
    5. Shacks in Goa- You get the BEST sea food there. Add to it loads of time and luxury.
    6. Olives ( Bandra, Mumbai)- Best lounge food and ambiance.  
    7. Cedars (Chennai)- Middle eastern food at its best.
    8. Nirulas (New Delhi)- Move over any other junk food joint, you cannot beat this place. World's Best Hot Chocolate fudge.
      8 Things I Look Forward To

      1.  My dance classes.
      2. Surprisingly my morning walks.
      3. My evening walks.
      4. Sleeping
      5. Reading, books or blogs.
      6. Going to the parlour and pampering myself.
      7. Shopping for Shoes.
      8. Going out for Movies.
      8 Things That Happened Yesterday 

      1. Wrote a blog
      2. Read blogs
      3. Talked on the phone.
      4. Went out, and did nothing.
      5. Walked.
      6. Traveled in the city.
      7. Stressed out.
      8. Snapped a lot at people.
       8 Things I love about Winter 

      1. I can wear nice sweaters.
      2. I can sit in my oversized sweat shirt and sweat pants the whole day.
      3. I can sleep all I want in my blanket.
      4. I love the fog.
      5. I can become a polar bear.
      6. I love the crisp air that I breathe in.
      7. The whole holding hands makes more sense in winters.
      8. And so does making love.
      8 Things on my Wish-list

      1. A job.
      2. Admission in  Harvard/ Yale/ Stanford/ UCLA ohkay, anywhere which is REPUTED.
      3. Great ideas for 25th wedding Anniversaries of numerous people and people who want me to do something nice at their functions.
      4. Money.
      5. Oh, freaking God, great results in the Semester exams
      6. Sort my life.
      7. Be more strong.
      8. Have successful career.
        8 Things I am Passionate about
        1. My DANCING.
        2. R
        3. My belief in Love.
        4. Relationships.
        5. Trying really hard to be happy.
        6. Travelling
        7. Writing
        8. Talking
          8 Words/Phrases I often use

          1. Yeah
          2. No way!
          3. WHAT
          4. Fuck off
          5. Whatever..
          6. YOU DID NOT
          8. Phlease

            8 Things I learnt from the past

            1. Faith is what you are left with, when you can really see nothing.
            2. Sometimes, it is OK to let go.
            3. That toothpaste on pimples really work.
            4. Sleep is the best medicine.
            5. Going to a doctor will give you a big bill, but will save you from hospital bills.
            6. Always check the water before you take a shower, same with the shampoo.
            7. Never think about ANYTHING while crossing the road, except crossing the road.
            8. Fight for your happiness, but not at the cost of hurting someone.
              8 Places I would like to go /Visit

              1. Leh 
              2. Kashmir (MINUS the terror)
              3. East India
              4. Venice
              5. Italy
              6. Vatican
              7. Greece
              8. Egypt
                8 Things I currently need/want.....

                1. Sleep.
                2. Zero Stress
                3. More flexibility in my body.
                4. Peace of mind
                5. My life.
                6. A job
                7. Admission for my Masters
                8. Sense of being me.
                  8 Blogging Buddies I want to Tag
                  1. The Footloose Doll
                  2. D.O
                  3. Roop
                  4. Miss M
                  5. Uncle J
                  6. Moo
                  7. Rohit Dassani
                  8. Ki

                  If you think that I have hurt you

                  Then you are not alone.
                  The pain that sears your heart,
                  it comes right back at me.

                  You don't have to wonder why?
                  if the hearts that are one,
                  they share, not just the love,
                  they share the sorrow,
                  the pain.

                  For every word that punched your tummy,
                  I held mine too,
                  for every thought that left you numb,
                  I was iced too.

                  I know you feel,
                  in the darkness below,
                  the signs that say, but then,
                  leave you lost too.

                  The labyrinth of thoughts,
                  the unwarranted twists,
                  the anger, the pain,
                  they have become so much for our lives,
                  that love feels running out of time.

                  But, my love, know thee,
                  that, after the pain there is some gain.
                  that after the darkness there is The light,
                  I am right here.
                  Standing where you left me.
                  It is just that-
                  Life has moved on.

                  I wanted to stay, and stay put,
                  but the sands of time,
                  tricked me too.
                  If you think, my love,
                  that I have hurt you,
                  then you should know,
                  That my heart bleeds too...!!!

                  Monday, March 1, 2010

                  Happy Holi Hai Ji!!!

                  I am not particularly fond of this festival. Actually, fondness for this festival is inversely proportional to age. As we grow older, at least to me, the charm of this festival is going down. No, not like the charm charm... I am one person who absolutely loves all the festivals here in our country. 
                  There are so many of them, that my school life had more holidays than working days thanks to them. 

                  But, I do not like the whole balloon throwing that I used like at one time, the pukka colors that used to take anytime between 3 to 10 days to get off properly. The tiredness, at the end of the afternoon, after you have been wet and dry at least a million times. 
                  It used to take more than a couple of calls and scowls from mom to come back home to get me into dry decent clothes and to bathe me, and then to put me to sleep. I remember how we used to pray hard that Holi comes after exams or comes so much before that, I don't have to beg to my parents for me to play Holi.
                  That was ages back.

                  The one that I remember the most of the recent times was two years back. My best friend threw the party for me. She arranged for Shayon to come to Delhi for the Holi weekend so that we could spend it together. That was fun.
                  Actually every year there is a party at her house. Outrageous. That is the word for that party. The only hard drink at her party is Bhaang, and food is great. But its the colors that take it all away. She gets, such colors that the 10 day time frame for the colors to go off you is, actually, not applicable to them. A month and a trip to the beauty parlor, and then, also you can see traces of pink on you.
                  And, she is the reason why I play Holi. Its her favorite festival.

                  No, this year, I have not stepped out of the house. There is no party at her place, because she is a working professional now. So, I am sitting tight at home, relaxing, and trying to get some work done as my entire house has gone to the colony Holi party to get themselves coloured.

                  So, my dear readers,
                  I hope you have a great great Holi, and that this festival brings in your life, great Joys and colors.