Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Elope.. A preview

My legs are aching and I am very sure that my feet are a mess.

Today was one of those days that could have gone in any direction. But, thank God for his little graces that, right now I am going to sleep with some peace and a sense of achievement. Whether it's actually an achievement, well, that will only be ascertained in some time.

Remember, I had talked about the couple who were planning to elope? Well, they actually accomplished that feat today with a lot of help from the boyfriend and me. So to put it simply, we were at wedding today, for which shayon and I did everything and our super efficient clerk arranged the wedding venue.

It was a first for both the boyfriend and me and I really hope that it's a last. I have a life time of strories related to the most coveted event, from the bride being more concerned about the saree and the make up than the time running out, from getting affidavits notarized to the drive into the most obscure part of Delhi, where I was almost hit by a mob for running over a woman's foot to well translating the wedding vows in English for the bride and the groom.

There is a severe need for a detailed post which will come soon.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Weekend… Clothes..

The weekend that went by, was by far one of THE most costliest weekend in like 6 years of the relationship that the boyfriend and I have been in. Yes, of course there was the birthday lunch two years back that was all five star and what not… but then this weekend was WONDERFUL!

And yes, in case you are wondering… much more special than the birthday lunch.

The MOST costly item in the list was a much hyped and a much wanted *not needed, but wanted* DSLR camera, which is VERY expensive, and every time I think about the money that has gone into it, my heart breaks, but then I see the pretty pictures that have come out of it *of me!* and I am much happier girl.

On Friday, when the camera was purchased, we met. And we also met, my best friend and her boyfriend, who btw, also completed 6 years yesterday! It was a typical 'Couple's Night Out' sorts, except both the couples were unmarried and had deadlines to go back home.

Saturday, was totally impromptu, after working for couple of hours and going crazy, all of a sudden, boyfriend and I decided to meet for lunch.. and not just any where, but at Shangri- La , where we had a Chinese buffet with a glass of wine J and clicked loads and loads of pictures.. later we went shopping for some Indian ethnic Kurtas for the boyfriend..

As we were heading homewards, he towards his, me towards mine, he said something thinking about which makes me smile and thank my stars .. he said that slowly he can see life settling down, and that after the turmoil of what to do, where are we heading.. he was happy that things are settling down. And for the records, if he thinks that life is settling down, and that he content with things, it is a great sign. And trust me , like I had said earlier, I really am not keen on any drama, I am mostly concerned with the contentment with life.

And on Sunday, my dear boyfriend went and bought 'Formal' shirts and trousers, with cuff links… actually he has been on the change of the 'wardrobe' spree for a really long time, but all of a sudden the speed of change has increased, and with that, the realization of the 'grown up' factor has also come into play. I don't really know why, but not the time of 6 years, not the fact that, the boyfriend has been working for the last couple of years, or the fact that I have been working for almost a year or that I have a car now, NOTHING, has made me realize the passage of time that has gone by. But the fact that he has bought himself formal clothes, has just given me the jolt and made me realize how much time has passed.

Weird, what all can clothes make you realize?

Friday, May 27, 2011


I am very disturbed. Actually, I am very worried.
The thing is that, I am very scared, scared about the fact that me and my boyfriend will not end being together. I really do ant to be him. Just him.
In my dreams, in my reality, I have never ever id magined my life with anyone else but him.

Okay before you all open your eyes wide, here is the thing;
I have written about it before also, the fact that my parents have said a categorical no to me and him because our  kundlis  don't match. We both in response have categorically stated that we don't care. As a matter of fact, my father recently asked me if I had 'reconsidered'; to which I had replied no. And then later, he had asked me about our future plan.Which btw, is a GREAT sign.
But then, I did something stupid...

Our office clerk and SNM, were talking about Palmistry etc... and I over heard and realised that the clerk knows palmistry and I also showed him my hand. And he also in many words told me that 'madam, jisse aap chahte hain, usse toh nahin hogi aapki shaadi'
And, yes I laughed it off. But the stupid nagging doesn't leave me! AT ALL!

On top of it, my mother dear,is so super concerned about the admission of my younger sister that she is following some advise given by some baba on the television *or so my mother claims* and because my younger sister is adhering to my mother's advise, I too have to do a couple of things that she says. My only concern is that, since she is the one who started the whole kundli natak, that she is making me do things that may just create havoc in my love life. And asking her questions means, a full fledged world war in the house. I avoid most of what she asks me to do by comfortably forgetting it but..

Yes, there is always a BUT, there is always this scare that, I am going to end up losing the person who as made me who I am. I would have probably ended my life, had I not had my boyfriend with me. I was a HUGE mess. I am very scared. I am very confused.

And shit just doesn't get over here... Office is a HUGE mess, a matter is a matter alive till the Supreme Court doesn't kill it. The current matter that I am dealing with is taking its toll on me. I almost decided to quit, till it stuck me that, I have no back up job and I need to double my salary ASAP so that I can get married to the boyfriend ASAP.
There is my stupid colleague SNM, who is living in with his fiancĂ©e and they have a pregnancy scare... which basically means that I am in the shoes of the 'Calm them Down' stuff! *Yeah, no ONE knows about this except me!*

And the lesson learnt from all of this- is That NEVER EVER TEMPT FATE! After that happy dappy post that came up a couple of days back... you can pretty much guess, that I am not so happy dappy any more!


Thursday, May 26, 2011

Song in My head

A hundred days have made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lies have made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
But all the miles that separate
Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight it's only you and me, yeah

The miles just keep rollin'
As the people leave their way to say hello
I've heard this life is overrated
But I hope that it gets better as we go, oh yeah 

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me

Everything I know and anywhere I go
It gets hard but it won't take away my love
And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done
It gets hard but it won't take away my love, whoa

I'm here without you baby
But you're still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby
And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you baby
But you're still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it's only you and me, yeah oh yeah oh

- "Here without you" by Three Doors Down

I made my poor darling wait for like two hours for meeting which seemed like couple of minutes! I really wish that something happens, despite all my efforts, I am hardly able to keep time. I just hate being late every time I have to go meet him.

Just wanna tell him that I don't intent to, but it just happens. I miss you!

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

The Crazy world of MARKS!

Where the hell is the world heading to?

The 12th Class result was declared yesterday. Those of us who have been and brought up here in India under the Indian education system are well aware of the fact, that how important is it to get a GOOD score in class 12th. Or as more often put by the teachers and parents- "Your future depends on it."

Yes, I agree that our future depends on our school result, because from there we start our journey to choosing our colleges etc.! But HELLO- the amount of pressure.. the value of marks? All has gone down the dumps.

My younger sister too got her results today. She is scored a 94%. I scored what a 70%.. she is still very unhappy because- this may mean not a good college in Delhi University!

Now- the college admissions are divided into two categories here-

One- is your professional courses, like engineering, medicine law etc, wherein you give their entrance examination and clear the same and require a minimum of 65% in your 12th Class boards to get admission.

Second- Is getting admission in Delhi University, where you need SUPER scores to get into a great college. Delhi University is divided into two campuses- The north campus, that houses the colleges like St. Stephens, Hindu, SRCC etc and the South Campus, which has maximum number of girls college, top most being Lady Sri Ram College and College of Jesus and mary along with some top notch colleges like Sri Venkateshwara college.

And to get admitted in these elite institutions you have to have a score which is above 90%. A 90% makes sure that you get into a decent college in Delhi University. You can forget about the premiere institutes, unless you decide to go for a course that is your secondary choice or tertiary choice… but a 90 + means that you may get a good college and MAY get the course of your choice and a 95% + makes sure that you have the world at your feet.

And trust me, there are kids who get, those many marks and there are loads and loads of kids, whose plans get altered because of .1% difference in marks.


There was a time when a 75% marks and a distinction meant a world. People valued marks and more importantly the university meant having fun in college. College did not mean such tough decisions on life.

I went through the same thing. As a matter of fact, I nicely fucked up the 'future making' years. Do I regret it? Yes, I used to. Today, well, there are times that I look back and give a 'what if' situation to myself.. but then you get what you deserve and nothing can change that!

My poor younger sister is very very distraught right now. The number of students in the 90+ bracket, is almost the double of what there were last year, and we all are very worried, mainly because, knowing her- She is VERY determined to do what she WANTS and nothing in this world can really take that away from her. No one has dared to any ways, but today, she knows that it is not the parents, the school or the friends who she has to deal with, but the crazy real world. And crazy realty of life!

I really hope for her sake and for all the hard- work that she has sincerely put in that- Her dreams come true!

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Am I grown up?

How do you know that you are grown up? Is there any sort of a indication that you are given- that tells you that now you are a grown up.. and hence you have to behave in a manner that is prescribed by the society!

Or one day you suddenly get up in the morning and you *WHAM* you are a grown up!

This question has been troubling me a lot these days, as a matter of fact it feels like that I am back in my teenage years, when it was often said that, we are 'Young' Adults and were expected to behave rationally, think rationally, but were still treated like kids.

So I am going to analyze, whether or not I am a grown up.. and then leave you all with a bunch of questions…


  1. Age: I am of the 'legal' majority age- Meaning thereby- I can vote, I have a driver's license and legally, I can get married too!
  2. Education: I am a graduate and a Law degree holder, passed with Honors…
  3. Work: I am employed in a law firm, where I am expected to work at least 7 hours a day and generate revenue for the firm! *It is a completely different matter altogether on the actual number of hours that I put in* and I get a salary at the end of each month.
  4. I have a car, I drive to work every day!
  5. No, I am not married, and thus have no kids.
  6. Yes, I stay with my parents, younger sister and grandmother.
  7. No, I do not make my bed each morning. As a matter of fact, I like to sleep in late.. and I am super lazy!
  8. Whenever my parents are out of station, the max that I have done is talked on the phone late night and helped my darling best friend, to sneak out at night. I am responsible kid/ grown up.. whatever!
  9. Oh, I don't smoke. And, I love a drink after a hard days work, but that is about it- I get a hug from my darling boyfriend after a hard day at work- I will not even have a drink after that!
And that pretty much sums it all up for me, now the thing that is happening is- that- There are girls in my office, who are my contemporaries, a year younger to me actually *I dropped a year!*; but the way they act- is NOT at all, the way that I act. I am just myself. And they both well, actually, behave like they are so much more senior or experienced than me. They, if I may use the word- act 'mature'. I do not know how a 24 year old is supposed to act.. but considering that the Partners I report to, have told a lot of times that- I need to grow up- has to indicate that I am not 'Grown up' as yet
But then, does being a grown up- mean, that you can't be excited about things.. or that you can't jump about, when you are happy? Or that, you have to always be in control of all your emotions? Yes, I do have a tendency to say wrong things at worst of timings. I have the knack of saying absolutely nonsensical things at times. Boyfriend has told me a million times to think before I speak- and I have tried too!

But this being a 'grown up' business, is little too out of my league.. or so I guess. I like to be babied, I love it when my father talks to me in the 'dad' tone, you know, like he is talking to his little girl. But at the same time, I can't stand it, when my father, acts like a total authoritarian, coz I am his little girl. That sort of gets me confused all over.

Maybe- I have to take a conscious decision, and stick to it- That I have to be a 'grown up'. But. The child in me, refuses to let go…!!

What do I do?

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Change in the winds..

I have been meaning to write for a really long time, but I just did not want to jinx the good times that are rolling around me. Actually, there is nothing particularly exciting that is making me happy, but the mundane peace that has started to descent over- that works for me too! More than the excitement that is very loud!

The most exciting  othing, apart from the car, is that Castle Season 3 starts end of this month, and so does the new season of How I Met your Mother (Of which I think I wrapped up like, 12-13 episodes already, thanks to the boyfriend).

Rest of the excitement is in the the hours that I spend at work. I was very confused at towards the mid of last moth when the change over happened and I was literally shoved to the firm's original office, where as the rest of the team was continuing to work in the old office. Rather, there were couple of days in the middle, when I was absolutely miserable, and I felt like an outsider to the 'Litigation Team' which I had left behind. There was the occasional leg pulling about how I had become a part of 'THEM'.. *Yeah, they are still not warming up to the idea of the merger!* as a matter of fact, there was on such occasion when I actually smsed Mr. MDR, telling him that I was hurt by the behaviour of Ms. P and Ms. V! Of course, there was a lecture that came my way which talked about the 'Physical distance changing the relationship equation'; well, of course things have changed.. aren't they bound to? But treating me the way they did, well, gave me the final push of what boyfriend has been trying to explain.. that I need to move on. Not that they are not there, its just that, time for expanding horizons and making new friends, has come! So, it hurts a tad bit less, but never the less, it did provide for a little growing up.

Talking of which, I have absolutely NO clue, about how to behave in the 'super chilled matured' way that the rest of them behave.. I was babied like crazy since the day I started working... now, it is time to grow up, and assume responsibilities! The best part being, that I get to interact with the clients and they call me first to get clarifications etc.. yes there have been days that have literally made me go MAD, by yapping on the phone, but then, I think, I will be able to adapt to the new world order.. as a matter of fact, the process continues! And I am a much more happy person than I was 15 days back!

Moving on, the personal life has been on an upswing! *TOUCHWOOD*, I have been meeting friends, Boyfriend and I took Kashvi out for dinner and drinks, where she drank non-alcoholic stuff *and she bumped into me in the middle of Def Col market, where we squealed and hugged like crazy girls in middle of the road, a cute guy honked at us to clear the way, and we exchanged smiles with the cute guy, only couldn't exchange numbers or names! SIGH!*! Boyfriend and I also hosted a friend's wife.. and best of all, boyfriend and I have been meeting, regularly, I may add. And, we have been talking again. Like really talking to each other. Not the mandatory conversations that had become sorta, weird, actual talks that make us smile! Yes, we have tiffs, but who doesn't! I still maintain and believe that, the best part about a fight is the 'kiss and the make up part' !
Hell, We have been kissing a lot.. lately! ;) *touchwood to that too*

*And, oh, we went to this AWESOME place in Saket's Select Citywalk Mall called Haggen-Danz, where, we both had some heavenly, ice creams and waffle, and that was our dinner! DAMN- I lost another day to lose weight!*

My parents too are calming down, to me being back at home from work at 10! I know it is ridiculous, but then that is how it has been... crazy busy! There is also the occasional of boyfriend's name and our future together talk thrown at me randomly.. which btw, is a great sign of success, that I hope shall follow soon!

There are the bad days. There are days that are worst off, but then everyday, the first person I see, is our receptionist at office, Anu (lets call her that here), who gives me courage to petty out my life problems.. you know why? Because, she hardly 30, and she lost her husband two years back to a terminal illness, and has two lil kids to look after! There is HUGE family support to her, but no family can replace the emptiness of heart.. that void! But, I still see her smiling an laughing.. talking to us, and pulling us up, for coming late.. giving us gossip, and making sure that the office is running smoothly!
And each day, she makes me Thank God, for what I have. She is really sweet, I tell you!

And before I sign off, in about 10 odd days Ms. Bludheemary will be joining the gang with Kashvi and me, here at Delhi, and I can't wait to have her here, and to have girl friends in real life to hang out with.. and I sincerely hope and pray that we get to spend time together... a lot of it!

I hope that life has been treating ye all well..!!! Till the next post- Cheers!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

I have an Autobot!

I have a NEW car!
A Chevy Beat! :)

For all those who are uninitiated, the Chevy Beat was one of the 'Good Cars' called the Autobots, in the movie The Transformers!

This is my newest possession! 

Sunday, May 1, 2011

A dedication - for my love!

I am sorry for hijacking Saxi's blog, but here's a song I wanted to dedicate to her, and thought what place better than here itself! :-)

Baby, I love you!!