My father always used to tell me that 'Law is in my genes!!'..
Not that I am ever going to argue about this statement to him, because, I certainly feel very related and extremely connected to my profession.
And, yes, unless its dancing or doing nothing, I don't see myself doing anything else for a living. As a matter of fact, I know it for sure that, I wont ever be able to make a living out of me being a dancer.
But right now, at this instant, I am in what I would like to call a situation of 'Passion Dwindling'; it seems that in a profession where, you learn something new each day, and that the learning never stops, I feel like I am a misfit. Often, I am made to feel inferior to my colleagues who have way way way more experience than me. As a matter of fact they are the ones who make me feel like that.
And there is a problem of 'fitting in'; that I am facing. I am supposed to belong to the 'Litigation Team'; that was acquired by my Law firm a couple of months back. But since there is another partner apart from my original boss, who handles litigation here in the Big office and owing to the fact that my seniors MDR and P do not like my work, they got me shifted here. And because there isn't too much work here in litigation and that I am supposed to be working and learning, I had to take over some additional responsibility in the Infrastructure Team. And to be honest, I like the work in this field better, maybe because I wanted to do corporate in the first place.
But now, I am having identity crisis... as to which team do I really belong to. Because, I have been thrust with a project in the infrastructure team, that is like my own baby.. and here in the so called litigation team, MDR, Ms. P and Ms. V; have their taunts ready to make me feel inferior. From, 'Oh, you don;t work on saturdays any more' to 'Oh, are you sure you can do this matter, or you have you ABC project running.. do you even have the time!'
Yes, there is a huge difference in the working styles of the litigation team here in the Big office and the other hard core team headed by my dear old boss. And, honestly speaking, I like it here, because, it gives me the bandwidth to explore more apart from my work life! The two litigation teams, are like a joint family, who have to pretend that they love each other because the partners are best friends and awfully close to each other.
And all the effort that is put in to do the team bonding.. goes awry. Because the team here can't shift to the smaller office, because of lack of seating space, and also the breathing space that they get here. And MDR, Ms. P ans Ms.V, will not come here. Their ego, and their ONLY WORK AND NO PLAY attitude doesn't gel with the light attitude here.
And, I do NOT want to be a part of this Tug of war. At all.
I am not going to let my career go down the drain, because they have their attitude. Job hunting thus begins, all over again.
Of course, Shayon moving to Mumbai is also a main reason. But, their sick attitude, makes me go mad!
So jobs any one?