Monday, June 18, 2012

The person you are trying to call is 'Busy' on another call!

Chintan wrote this very interesting post about how women should leave their men alone and not go the emotional mile with them, especially, when he is 'busy' at work.
I agree to some extent, but disagree to the most part of it. *Sorry Chintan, the disagreement comes from being in the category of the girls who call up their beaus a lot*

I do call him. As a habit/ritual.. in the morning for exactly 3 minutes, when I am walking from my car towards the office. And I used to, at the end of the day while walking back from my office to my car. Now I don't.
Then I usually call him, when I am going to bed.
We don't stay in the same city, let alone the same house. I normally know what he is upto thanks to his facebook updates, and his rhetorical questions to the world about buying an 'X' gadget or an air conditioner. He doesn't call me.

I am never the first thing in his mind when he wakes up. I don't think that I am the last thing in his mind when he goes to sleep either.

He is always working. Being on a Social media platform- he is always online, and available to the world 24x7. But to me.

Where does a girl got at the end of the day? In a 7 year old relationship, I should not be insecure.. the problem is, that I was not insecure about my relationship, 7 months into it. The problem is, that, when you have time for the world, for the friends who drop in, for the friends who call up after ages, I am thrown off the priority list, not that I was ever priority number one. The "Khota Sikka" cocept works the best for us.
He is all mine, when he is in the city.. he wants to just blabber on about everything, when HE has to talk.. what happens to me, who wants to talk to him at the end of a shor/long, tiring/not so tiring day? Oh, yes, I don't have work 24x7.
And, I don't exactly have a hobby of 'Silai, khadai' that I can do, whilst remembering him, and sighing about our memories of the short dates that we have had.
He is always agitated about the fact, that whenever I meet him, I am always on a time limit. I am bound to be. I am not the 'party till late' kind of girl.

I won't normally even complaint. I am happy that he is busy. But, how fair is it on me?
The calls that come are only for work. "Did you do this?" "Did you talk to xyz?" I don't remember any call in the last couple days/weeks/months, where he calls up to tell me, "Baby, I called you just like that" "That I was missing you"
I of course seem to be missing from his life. He never bothers to wonder, "Oh, no call at 10 am today.. I hope all is okay".. or "aaj sara din phone nahin aaya.. pata nahin kahan hai?"
His funda is of course "No news is good news"

At the end of the day, each day, I give in to my heart over my self respect, and my mind, as I dial his number to talk to him, only to hear ..
"The person you are trying to call is busy on the other line, please wait or call later" *8 out of 10 times, he does not call back.*

"Hi.. what were you doing...
He: I was just gonna have dinner...
Should I wait? or sleep?
He: You should sleep" *Yup, no call back*

"Hi, kya ho raha hai..
He: Kuch nahin kaam, aur kya
Okay, then, I am hitting the sack..
He: Yeah, sure, good night"

"Hey.. wassup?
He: Nothing, XYZ has just come over/ Oh, ABC has skype called me...
Oh, okay, Good night then
He: Yeah, good night"

In none of the cases above, he ever calls back.. obviously he doesn't want to ruin my beauty sleep. But, honestly I wish he would.
There is nothing in this world that makes a girl happier than an unexpected text/e-mail/phone call from that special someone telling her that she is special.
Yup, I know I sound like a love sick puppy.. but trust me.. the feeling of being taken for granted in a relationship kills you.
Of course, this post will change nothing, he is too busy to read my posts.
But at least I have ranted out how I feel. A girl needs someplace to rant/ rave express herself.. considering the pair of ears she hopes would listen are "Busy gossiping with a friend right now"

PS: Somehow, I know people who do make time for the ones they love..  


♪♪Happy Go Lucky♪♪ said...

Aw Sakshi, your post touched me in so many ways. (Very unexpected this is, but it really did.)

I broke up with my last boyfriend for the same reason about a couple of years back. I was being taken for granted by the guy I loved to death. I would spend hours thinking about him but he just wouldn't. I was always the one calling too. When he was away on a vacation, he'd be too busy with his family to talk, while I was away on vacation, he'd be the one having to work.
And I realise that this cycle never ends. And if the blame game starts, its never going to end and that made me lose faith in relationships altogether.
I would like a guy and get 'clingy' and break up, but I'd rather just be friends with him and get more than I'd ever expect.
And for the fact that you have stuck on to your relationship for so long in spite of all this, Kudos!!

I know how good it feels to vent on your blog and I miss it so much. Right now, everybody I know is reading my blog and bitching about me and I can only wish to block them :/

KittySigurdardottir. said...

Are you kidding me,this man is obviously using you?He's probably a big time Playboy and an expert Pick-Up Artist,not one of those ordinary onse that you see right through instsntly,that's why you have not detecetd him as one.I must admit I admire him as such a great Master of the Art,such great Artists are few and far between.

KittySigurdardottir. said...

By the way,did you know there is a fully nude to the knees woman displayed in the link,although the breasts are tiny they are still there.