Thursday, March 11, 2010

55 words or Less : Freedom

She stepped out and died. Opened her eyes to free air, free sun and freedom. But the bird had forgotten, that, her best friend was the open sky and not the cage where she had been confined all her life.
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Does this even qualify for 55 words or less? Please react. This is MY first attempt.

4 comments:

The Bald Guy said...

It's 40 words. Not bad for the first time!

The Bald Guy said...

Include the question at the end of it begging for comments, and then it's 56.

You go girl!

Yay you!

The Bald Guy said...

Poor bird. My sympathies are with her. God bless the bird's soul and your brain too for writing this.

:P

ani_aset said...

you need to reveal climax in last line to make it effective..may be if you could put the first line at the end